Page 23 of Christmas, Actually

‘Yes.’ He nodded. ‘Evergreen House is a special place. I meant it when I said you should join me when I go again.’

‘Thanks, I’d like that,’ Clara said, realising how much she wanted to accompany Liam on that visit. ‘So, are you just out for a walk?’ she asked. She was out of practice with conversation and felt tongue-tied, but for some reason she wanted to keep Liam occupied. She felt a pressing desire to talk to him, to get to know him better, and didn’t want him to suddenly decide to continue his walk alone.

‘Yes.’ He nodded at the dog. ‘Figgy insisted.’

‘Do you live around here?’ She glanced at the houses lining the pavement which wound into the distance before disappearing around a sharp bend.

‘Yep.’ His mouth mashed together and she wondered if there was something he wanted to say. ‘I live wi—’ His face suddenly changed, paling and the skin seemed to stretch across his cheeks as his eyes caught on something over her shoulder, ‘Not again,’ he groaned.

‘What?’ Clara asked, about to turn to check when Liam placed a palm on her shoulder.

‘Please don’t look.’ He dragged his gaze back to her face. ‘I… There’s someone walking up the high street who I don’t want to talk to.’ He glanced around, clearly looking for a hiding place. ‘I’m not ready to have a conversation with him, especially with Mia being back.’ The breath rushed from his throat and Clara took a step closer. Why didn’t he want to speak to the man – and how was it connected to his wife?

‘Who is he?’ she asked.

Liam’s mouth thinned. ‘My twin brother,’ he said, and there was something in his voice that told her things weren’t good between them.

She nodded, despite every cell in her body wanting to ask more. ‘Where is he?’ she asked instead. She could feel the stress coming off Liam in waves. Knew that feeling and wanted to help.

Liam’s eyes met hers. ‘Walking down the high street. He’s going to pass us in a few moments. I really don’t want to talk to him.’

Clara didn’t know what came over her, but the idea popped into her head and she just decided to run with it. Impulse wasn’t something she usually ascribed to herself – there was too much opportunity to make a mistake and even more to make a fool of herself. But in this moment, all that mattered was Liam. So she pulled off her glove and tugged off his hat, ignoring his sharp inhale because she didn’t have time to explain. ‘Trust me,’ she said, then threaded her fingers through his hair and encouraged his head downwards – going up onto her tiptoes so she could meet his lips.

The kiss had been intended as a distraction. Firstly, Clara wanted Liam to be fully focused on her so he wasn’t thinking about his brother and whatever had happened to drive a wedge between them and secondly, she wanted his brother to walk right on by.

Not many people would stop and wait for a couple to end a kiss before striking up a conversation. But once her lips met Liam’s, Clara realised their embrace was going to be a lot more than a simple diversion. It felt too real to be just that.

First kisses were usually slow; they didn’t produce heat at the outset. They were more of an introduction to the way someone tasted, a slow slide of exploration and an exercise in getting to know you. But as Clara’s lips touched Liam’s, she tasted trifle and chocolate, and her appetite seemed to take on a life of its own. Obliterating every sensible, rational thought she’d ever had and making a mockery of all the lessons her mother had tried to teach. The ones that said you should think before you acted, that her behaviour was a reflection on the family, that you never chased men because they should come to you.

If Maeve Frost could see her now…

Liam got over the shock of Clara kissing him within seconds, because instead of pulling away and asking if she’d lost her mind, he deepened the kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist so he could pull her closer.

Clara didn’t know if he’d caught onto her plan and had decided to just run with it, falling into the distraction body and soul, or if this was real. It certainly felt real. Especially when he tipped her backwards like they were doing some kind of elaborate dance and she shut her eyes. She could feel herself falling – not literally, but this was everything she’d ever imagined a kiss should be. Warm, fervent, soft, determined, passionate and totally overwhelming. It felt like her whole life had been leading to this moment and it was everything she’d always dreamed it should be.

Her heart was hammering in her chest, but she could just about hear a set of footsteps pause as Liam’s brother drew close. Someone cleared their throat and Liam’s arms tightened around her as his breathing grew uneven.

Clara was expecting him to pull away, but then Figgy let out a low growl and Clara heard a frustrated sigh, then the footsteps started up again, rhythmically tapping on the pavement until they were too faint to hear.

That’s when Liam broke off the kiss and pulled away, still holding onto Clara’s arms as if he were unwilling to break the connection.

‘I—’ He stared down at her, his brown eyes darker than Clara had ever seen them. His mouth was a reddish pink and the snow, which had grown heavier while they were kissing, had settled on his hair, adding a smattering of sparkling white into the lush brown waves. He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat, which just made her want to go up onto her tiptoes again. ‘Thank you,’ he said roughly.

Clara pulled a face. It wasn’t exactly what she’d been hoping for, but she jerked her chin because she wasn’t sure what she’d expected. ‘You’re welcome,’ she said. ‘I’m sorry – I’m sure that was a complete surprise, but I was trying to think of something I could do so you didn’t have to talk to your brother and –’ She cleared her throat. ‘– that seemed like the best option.’

Her words raced out as nerves and shock at what she’d done caught up, leaving her feeling mortified. Had she honestly just launched herself at Liam in the middle of the high street? She’d kissed him without even asking if it was okay. Her cheeks burned and she took a step back, breaking contact as his arms dropped away, keen to draw a line under the incident. Intending to communicate that she wasn’t about to do it again.

Even if she now wanted him so badly that her whole body trembled.

‘No, um…’ Liam seemed equally tongue-tied. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes had darkened and when he looked down at her, she felt everything inside her constrict. ‘Actually, I liked it,’ he said quietly.

Clara felt herself relax. Because the kiss hadn’t been enough – because she really wanted to kiss Liam all over again, and from what he’d just said, he might feel the same. But she took another step away from him, regardless – because she couldn’t while she was still engaged.

Clara let out a long breath. ‘So did I.’ She stared into his eyes, trying to communicate exactly how much. ‘But –’ She cleared her throat. ‘– I guess we ought to get out of this snow.’ She pointed back the way she’d come, indicating she was going to be heading to Eleanor’s shop, hoping Liam would invite her to join him in his home. ‘Um, unless you want to talk about—?’ She nodded in the direction his brother had gone, realising she’d been so overwhelmed by the kiss that she’d failed to ask about Liam’s twin.

‘I—’ He looked conflicted. ‘Maybe.’ Then something beeped and he tugged off his glove and pulled his phone from his pocket. His lips thinned as he read the message and he nodded. ‘I’ll need to raincheck.’ He cleared his throat. ‘Now isn’t a good time.’ His forehead squeezed and Clara realised she was still clutching his hat so handed it to him.

Liam glanced up the high street again before turning to face her. ‘I’d like to talk, there are some things I should probably tell you, but I’ve got—’ He cleared his throat. ‘To get home, um, someone’s waiting and–’ He grimaced. ‘– it’s a bit too complicated to explain now, but I’d like to.’