Page 127 of Before We Break

“Do you love her?”

His chin wobbles, and he responds with a jerky nod.

“Good. She’s going to need all the love she can get. You need to be strong for her.”

I hold out my hand and wait for him to take it. When he does, I help him to his feet and do the only thing I can think of in this situation. I hug him.

CLIO

I tuck the blanket tighter around Lexi’s legs as she rests in her hospital bed. The tears have dried, but she’s staring blankly at the ceiling, and the dissociation is even more concerning. Her bloodied prom dress has been tucked away in a plastic bag, contrasting starkly with the hospital gown she was forced to change into, the memory of the day she tried it on now tarnished by its ruination.

We’re in what feels a lot like a glass box with a sliding door that nurses keep coming in and out of. If they don’t get her some care soon, I’m going to get myself arrested. Nothing I’ve been through in my life has prepared me for this moment. All of the heartache and devastation is incomparable to this feeling of helplessness.

It’s like we’re suspended in a heartbreaking purgatory. I’m almost positive she’s miscarrying, but until we get confirmation, there’s still this niggling uncertainty—a glimmer of hope that dims as the seconds tick by.

I run my hand over her hair and press a kiss to her forehead. “What can I do?”

She just shakes her head.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t there.”

“It’s ok,” she croaks out. “I think it needed to be Noah.”

She’s probably right. I’m not sure I could’ve held it together long enough to get her here. I barely made it myself, and I had Jaxon behind the wheel. Callie wanted to come, but someone had to stay with the twins. It was probably for the best—he stayed calm and collected while I fell apart in the passenger seat. I love my sister, but she would’ve been a mess.

A nurse in blue scrubs comes into the room holding a clipboard. She asks for Lexi’s name and date of birth and informs us we’ll be taken to another room for an ultrasound soon.

Lexi grips my hand. “Hayden should be here. Please.”

As much as it pains me to leave her, she’s right. This is—was—his baby, too. They should get to say goodbye together.

“Can I go get her boyfriend?” I ask.

The nurse nods.

I squeeze Lexi’s hand one last time and head back to the waiting room. When I get there, Noah and Hayden are sitting side by side in the same position with their forearms draped over their knees.

Hayden doesn’t immediately look up as I approach, so I place my hand on his shoulder. “Hayden. Lexi’s asking for you.”

His glassy eyes meet mine, a silent question lingering there.

“I’ll take you to her.”

Hayden follows me back down the hallway that feels like it goes on forever. “They’re going to take you to an ultrasound to confirm.”

He nods solemnly. I’m sure he already knows what’s going to happen, and I can’t bear to say it out loud. When we stop outside of the sliding door that leads to her room, I pull him in for another hug. “She’s not herself. Be patient with my baby.”

“I love her, Miss Marsden.”

I press my palm to his cheek. “I know, but thank you for telling me.”

My tears begin to fall in earnest as I make my way back to Noah. He’s not sitting in the chair anymore, though. He’s standing just beyond the swinging doors. Without saying a word, he sweeps me into his arms and holds me against his chest as my silent cries become all-out sobs.

Noah Weston is the only reason I’m standing right now. If not for him, I’d be on my knees screaming to whatever gods exist, begging and pleading to spare my daughter this pain. I’d take it all from her if I could.

My fists tangle in the back of Noah’s shirt as I silently plead with him instead.

Please don’t leave me.