Page 109 of Surrogate For My Best Friend’s Man 2

“I know.”

“Do you?”

I didn’t answer and she let it go thank God. For a while, we sat there quietly, then Grandma looked at my plate. “You done?”

“Yeah.”

“ I’ll wrap that chicken up.”

“I don’t want it.”

“You will later.”

“No, I won’t.”

Grandma stood. “You're pregnant, you'll be hungry before you get past Seven Mile.”

“Why Seven Mile?”

“I don’t know where hunger starts.”

Only Grandma could drag me through an emotional ass whooping and then argue about leftover chicken five minutes later. I stayed a little longer. By the time I got ready to leave, my mind wasn’t any clearer. If anything, Grandma had made it worse.

Before, I could only blame Deuce. I had to take accountability for my actions as well. He had started this mess but I’d helped keep it alive.

At the door, Grandma hugged me. “Call me when you get home.”

“I will.” She handed me a foil-covered plate.

“I told you I don’t want that.”

“And I told you I don’t care.”

I took it.

“Bossy.”

I stepped outside. “Love you, Grandma.”

“Love you too, baby.”

I made it halfway to my car before she called after me.

“Shante.”

I turned.

Grandma stood in the doorway. She didn’t make another joke. “Whatever you decide, make sure you can live with it when you ain’t scared no more.”

I didn’t answer. I got into my car and shut the door. That stayed with me the whole drive home. I knew keeping this from Alisha was wrong. I knew every normal conversation between us was built on something she didn’t know. I knew the longer I waited, the worse it would be if she ever found out. But fear didn’t always make people run. Sometimes it made you hold tighter to the very thing you were destroying.

And that’s exactly what I was doing. I wasn’t telling Alisha not tonight, not tomorrow. If I had my way, not ever. I’d have these babies and Kim would take them. Deuce would deal with whatever happened with his case. Eventually, enough time would pass that maybe this whole nightmare could become something we didn’t talk about anymore.

It was fucked up, I knew that. But losing Alisha felt more real to me than doing the right thing. So I chose the secret. What I didn’t know was that it wasn’t mine to keep anymore.

A few weeks had passed since I went to see Deuce, and somehow my life had gotten even more complicated. My doctor had officially put me on bed rest. With the twins getting close and my blood pressure giving them something else to watch, I had strict instructions to stay off my feet as much as possible. So most of my days consisted of me and my bed and the tv grandma bought me way too much time to think.

Grandma had taken over everything else. She brought food, groceries, checked on me constantly, and acted like getting up to walk across my own apartment was a criminal offense. The apartment wasn’t as empty as it had been when Malik first left. Grandma helped me replace some things, and I’d ordered a few necessities online, but it still felt empty.