Page 119 of Home Ice

“And if it doesn’t?” I’m trying so, so hard not to get excited, but having Hawke only two hours away? Being able to keep my job and stay close to Dad and still have him in my life? It feels too good to be true, but now that Hawke has put it out there, I want it more than anything.

“If it doesn’t, we come up with a new plan. And then another one. And another one. We don’t stop until we’re together. For real. I’m not giving up on this, and this time, I need you to be all in as well.”

“I can’t lose you again either.” If it takes us all the way to plan Z, I’ll do it. I’m in this. No running away this time. “And what about your pretty house?”

“There are houses in every city.” He cups my face. “But there’s only one you. Fuck the house. Fuck St. Louis. Fuck everything that will keep us apart. Ten years couldn’t stop us, Tai. So nothing will.”

Just hearing those words is like everything I’ve ever needed being handed to me. Hawke wants me. The relief that floods my body is so heavy I sag forward, head on his shoulder, and let him hold me up like he’s been doing ever since he got back. I’m getting better about doing it for myself, but part of that is accepting help when I need it.

And I’ll always need it from him.

“I love you so much,” I tell him, and for the first time, the pain is absent from the words.

“I love you too,” he whispers, large hand stroking my hair. “And I’m never leaving you again.”

Chapter Thirty-Nine

JENSEN

It’s already too cold for swimming. Vermont summers are like a dream; vivid and alive, but gone too quickly. We sit on the edge of the river, surrounded by a patch of dandelions, soaking in our favorite spot, while I’m shoulder to shoulder with my favorite person.

Barrett’s head is tilted back to the sky, catching the last of the weak sun, and I watch him, happily, knowing how much I’m going to miss these quiet, simple moments with him.

I’m scared that I’ll leave, and Barrett will be like a dream too. Thinking like that isn’t helping anyone though, so I push it from my mind and trust that we’ll be strong enough for this. We haven’t waited our whole lives for this moment only to have it end.

My hand finds the closest dandelion fluff, and I pluck it from the grass.

“Make a wish,” I tell him, reaching over to hold it in front of his face.

His eyes narrow my way. “Have you been talking to my dad?”

I smother a laugh at the memory of Ben doing this when we were younger. “I’d forgotten.”

“Did you also forget that I don’t believe in wishes?”

“Humor me.”

“Why? I have everything I could wish for.”

He’s sweet, but I’m not buying it. “There’s nothing you can think of? Nothing unrealistic or ridiculous or way beyond what you ever let yourself want?”

His lips pinch, and I know I’ve got him. “Fine.” Then, for maybe the first time ever, Barrett leans in and blows the dandelion fluff. It bursts into a cloud, catches on the breeze, and his wish is carried far from his cynicism.

“You gonna tell me what you wished for?” I murmur.

My best friend’s face turns wicked, and then he reaches for the hem of his shirt. I watch, curious, as he pulls it over his head. “Something you’ve been teasing me with for a long time but still haven’t done yet.”

I have no idea what he’s getting at until he leans back … and flicks his nipple.

“Your wish was for me to lick it?”

Barrett’s eyes soften as he runs a hand back through my curls. “My wish was for you to have everything you’ve ever wanted. So why not start here?”

It’s like I can feel my heart melting in my chest. What the hell did I ever do to deserve him? Tai Barrett is a one-of-a-kind guy, and for as worried as I can get over losing him, he also makes me as equally sure that this is the kind of love that’s meant to be.

I lean over him, pressing my lips to his neck and tasting his sun-warmed skin. The feel of him under me will never get old, and no matter how many times we’re together, it’s like I’m discovering him for the first time. The excitement, the anticipation, the way my body reacts to his with this pull I’ve been fighting since we were teenagers …

Tai grunts and pulls me down against him, sealing our bodies together. The grass is scratchy, but that thought is gone almost as soon as I have it because my lips continue across his skin, and my brain almost short-circuits when I reach his nipple.