Page 74 of The Cost of Love

“I know a lot of the big stuff, like what drives you and what has shaped you, but I am curious about the things that light you up. Like you enjoy cooking, but if you could, what other hobbies would you have?” Battling the urge to stand up and walk over to her, instead, I drink the wine to keep my hands busy.

“I don’t know, and I don’t think it matters. I won’t have any time soon to do anything more. But I guess if given the opportunity, I would probably read more. Especially poetry. I looked some up after that one dinner with you, and it’s beautiful. It makes life seem beautiful.”

In this moment, I wish that I were capable of writing sonnets. Words wrapped in images to speak about her virtues. Her capacity for beauty deserves to be written about.

“I also think maybe, if you want, that you could teach me how to paint?” She doesn’t face me as she asks, but the way she shifts from foot to foot tells me exactly what she is thinking.

Now, that I can do. I may not be able to say it, but I can always show her how I see her.

“Of course.”

I continue to ask her questions, and gulp down the information greedily. By the time she puts the plated sweet chili snapper in front of me, I am starved for both it and her. After I snap a picture to send to Carter, I can’t talk through the first few bites, my mouth too busy devouring the impeccable meal. Every time I think I have fully tasted something, a new flavor emerges from each chew.

Waiting to see what I have to say, she watches me quietly.

“You need to open a restaurant.”

She hides her mouth behind her hand.

“I’m serious. I’ll fund it, you just continue to cook amazing meals like this.”

“Stop.”

“I am being honest, Chanice. People deserve to taste this food.” I take another bite, half to drive the point home and to also just have more of it in my mouth. Finally tasting her own meal, she shuts her eyes and moans.

“This is the first time, in a long time, that I have had the ingredients to create like this.” Her eyes are shining brighter than ever before, and she can’t keep her lips together.

This whole night, I have been trying to learn who she is, and through this dish, she showed me. It’s like what she said when she went into my bedroom that first time. This isn’t just something she does.

I don’t talk for the rest of the meal. It’s not until the dessert of lemon tarts that I can finally bridge the topic that has been on my mind.

“So I have a charity auction I have to go to midway through December in a few weeks.”

“You go to a lot of charity events.”

“It’s a part of the job. I would like you to go to this one with me.”

Her eyebrows lift up, and she turns in her seat facing me. There is a twist to her lips that doesn’t exactly fit the reaction I thought she would have.

“It would be the experience we talked about. Fancy food, designer dress, us dancing the night away.” Trying to sell it, I hope that she will say yes.

“I thought you forgot about that.”

“I didn’t.”

She gets up to take our plates, and I stop her, moving to put them in the sink for us.

“I don’t have anything to wear.” Starting to put away the leftovers, I can tell she is trying to keep her hands busy.

I stop her, turning her to face me. “Think of a better excuse, because you know I am going to buy you a dress, or suit. Whatever you want.”

“What if my job is catering the event? Either I would have to work, or I would awkwardly be served by my friends. I sort of hope it is doing the job, because I definitely need the money.” Rubbing her hands up and down her face, she sighs. “I got another job that pays better, but it doesn’t start for a month, and I need to make that extra money.”

“I’m hoping the rules have changed now that we are dating, so let me contribute.” I put my hands on her waist.

“They didn’t change.” She buries her face into my chest, exhaling against my shirt.

“Just hear me out. I pay for a place for you and the kids, and you can take the opportunity you told me about in the kitchen. That way, you don’t have to worry as much about money, you can pursue your dreams, and have a bedroom.” I laugh a little at that, trying to keep the conversation light.