Page 139 of Queen of War and Ruin

Somewhere in the back of my head, Petrys screams at me to actually talk to her for fuck’s sake. I step back and clear my throat.

“So,” I say. “We’ll reach Marion tomorrow.”

She glances down at the grass between us and makes a sound in the back of her throat that’s not quite a word. I sigh.

“We should talk,” I say. “About what happens next.”

Lilias nods. Her hair trembles in the wind.

“And,” I admit. “I need to apologize.”

“Again?”

I wince. “Yes. For what happened in the hunting lodge.”

“Oh.” She turns away again. “You mean getting drunk, or⁠—”

Her voice falters. The stream gurgles behind us, and the wind pushes her hair back from her face. She takes a step back, then turns to face me. There’s a strange, hard look in her eyes.

“Do you still want a divorce?” she asks.

Chapter 69

Lilias

DIVORCE

Zarek’s mouth opens. For a moment, I’m afraid my heart is pounding so hard I won’t even be able to hear his response.

And, hells. Maybe I don’t want to hear his response. Yes, he said he loves me, but the man I married isn’t some sentimental farmer. He’s a prince, whether he was born to the role or not. He survived because he’s cunning, because he can play their games.

And he’s already told me our marriage has no strategic value.

“I—” Zarek begins.

He looks at the stream, then at me, then back at the tumbling water rolling off the mountain’s shoulders, and in that strange, trembling moment, I remember exactly how beautiful he looked when he was singing prayers to his gods in the thin light of an early spring morning.

“I want to give you what you want,” he finally says, his words slow and careful. “You didn’t ask for this marriage. You shouldn’t be—” His throat bobs as he swallows. “Trapped.”

I cross my arms over my chest like I can keep my heart from running away.

“And you?” I ask. “What do you want?”

He blinks like he doesn’t understand the question.

“You didn’t ask for this marriage either,” I say. “And, like you said, there’s no strategic value to it, not anymore. So, what do you want now? Do you want a divorce?”

“Fuck, no,” he sputters. The look on his face is suddenly raw and hard. “Princess, I love you. The gods know I tried not to, but the harder I fought it⁠—”

His voice cuts off in a ragged laugh. He tugs his hand through his hair before turning back to me.

“But that doesn’t change anything,” he finally says. “You deserve better.”

I laugh. It comes out before I can stop it, a sharp, hard burst like an explosion. Zarek stares at me.

“Better?” I ask. “Like what, exactly? Like Blayne?”

“I didn’t mean⁠—”