Page 108 of Glutton for Punishment

“Well, I’ll just leave you all to... whatever this is. I know my way back,” I say strained.

“Absolutely not,” both Maddox and Atticus say in unison. It’d be comical if my bond wasn’t bloodthirsty.

Atticus recovers first, glaring at Maddox. “I’ll take her back to her room,” he says. “Paris came here to talk to you. I don’t need to be part of this conversation.”

Maddox’s jaw grinds. For a second, I think he may refuse out of spite. Then he gives one sharp nod.

“Fine.” His eyes find mine. “Straight back to your room. Please.”

I bite the inside of my cheek to keep from saying something I’ll regret.

The walk back to my room is painfully awkward. Gone is the easy warmth from when Atticus first arrived. In its place sits a thick, uncomfortable silence that stretches all the way down the hall. I can only stand it for so long.

“So... you and Paris?” I ask, trying for casual and failing miserably.

Atticus exhales sharply through his nose.

“That feels like a lifetime ago,” he says quickly. “It was brief, and I was young and stupid enough to think she was anything close to what I wanted.”

“…So not serious?” I ask.

“Absolutely not.” He grimaces. “I’m pretty sure she was using me, anyway. To get under Maddox’s skin.”

“Oh.” I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. “It’s none of my business, sorry. I’m just...” I gesture. “Trying to understand this family and failing spectacularly.”

“There is no understanding. They are all insane,” he mutters.

We reach my door and he turns to face me. “It is your business, Arwen.”

Something in his tone makes me go still.

“I know I may not have your full trust yet,” he says quietly, “but you can believe me when I tell you I have absolutely no feelings for anyone else. And I never will.”

Heat rushes to my face so quickly that I am certain he notices. I glance away, clearing my throat.

“Well,” I say, unable to look at him, “you know... maybe now that we’re both going back to the academy...” My fingers twist together. “We could spend more time together. Talk. Get to know each other.”

The lingering silence makes my heart drop into my stomach. I look up and immediately wish I hadn’t.

The look on his face is devastating.

“Oh,” I say, panic rising. “Or not. Sorry! That was awkward. I don’t know why I assumed you had feelings for me just—”

“No.” He steps forward and grabs my hand. “No, Arwen, it’s not that.”

“Then what is it?”

His face shutters, the warmth in his eyes snuffing out like a candle in a sudden breeze. I brace myself.

“There’s something I need to tell you.”

My chest constricts as he painfully explains the deal with his father. The condition for my return to the academy. The distance we’ll have to keep.

“It was the only way,” he whispers when he finishes.

I stare at him. There’s no mistaking the despair in his eyes. I understand that this is him trying to protect me. That almost makes it worse.

My throat burns. “So it’ll be just like last year,” I mumble.