Page 59 of An Engagement with the Enemy

“I haven’t the slightest desire to get to know anyone else,” he said. When her eyes widened, he tried to recover from that admission. “I know what I promised Father. I said I would try to find a wife. I agreed to his scheme of inviting every unmarried woman in the kingdom to our home. But it’s been a waste of time.”

Catherine huffed and folded her arms across her chest. “Only because you have sabotaged every single one of those ladies thus far. You and Jessica, both.”

His jaw dropped open, then he closed it and lowered his gaze to the floor. “Did Jessica tell you?” He wasn’t surprised, really. The two told each other everything. They always had.

“No. But as I know you both, and I’ve had the best seat to this farce you two planned, I saw what was happening. I may have even thought it amusing, at first,” she admitted. When he glanced up again, his sister appeared anything but amused.

“And now?” he asked. “Are you going to give the game up to our parents?”

Slowly she shook her head. “No. But you should stop. And you shouldn’t see Jessica anymore. Or at least, see her as little as possible.”

“Why?” he asked, taking a step closer to his sister. “Don’t you want us to be friends?”

He was missing something here. Something his sister wouldn’t tell him.

Had he given too much about his feelings away? Had Jessica feigned illness to avoid him, and now Catherine was trying to tell him—? What? That Jessica didn’t want a friendship? “Did Jessica tell you to say this?”

“What?” Catherine blinked at him, her surprise genuine. “No. And yes. I mean—I want you both to be friends. Jessica didn’t tell me to say anything.” She sighed and paced away from him. “Why are you both so stubborn when it comes to one another?”

His thoughts came to a halt as he turned slowly to his sister. “What do you mean by that?”

Catherine turned and walked back to him, then touched his arm, her voice gentle yet firm. “You need to stop meddling with her feelings, James. Because you’re my brother, I know you didn’t mean to do anything that would hurt her intentionally. But I fear you’ve not thought about what your actions would mean to Jessica.”

He stared at his sister, still not comprehending what she was trying to get at. “I would never hurt her. What are you saying? Stop speaking in such vague terms. It sounds as though I did something wrong, and if that’s true, I should like to know what it was so I can correct the mistake.”

He’d apologize to Jessica a thousand times, on his knees if need be, to make things right between them. He’d never hesitate to admit wrongdoing again. He’d never make the same mistake twice, either. He loved her too much. The idea that he had caused her pain made him want to run to her that very instant and make reparations.

He wasn’t the same man he’d been at the start of summer.

“You haven’t hurt her. Yet,” his sister said, the last word sharp and full of warning. “But you’re being careless with her heart, James. You aren’t thinking of what you are doing, leading Jessica along. Flirting with her. Devoting so much time to her. She’s bound to get the wrong idea. To form expectations.”

James stepped backward, out of his sister’s grasp. “You think I’m toying with her. I would never, ever do that to a lady. Not to any woman. That you think so little of me—”

“I don’t,” Catherine said. She paced away from him again. “You’re so stubborn, James, and such a fool sometimes. If you keep spending time with Jessica, if you keep looking at her the way you did at the fair, the way you have nearly all summer, everyone will think you’re in love with her. Everyone will expect you to marry her. And that will be a disaster for you both!”

That his sister had divulged his feelings shocked him, but her declaration at the end of her passionate rant made him rear his head back.

“What the devil do you mean? A disaster?”

“You know about her hysteria,” Catherine said, rounding on him and pointing her finger in accusation. “She told me that you know. And you would still court her? James. You must think of your position and what is expected of you. Jessica cannot be a baroness. London would undo her. The ton would eat her alive. She would be miserable as your wife. Why do you think she’s said she never intends to marry? She knows how impossible it would be.”

Pain sliced through him like a knife. Miserable? The very thing he’d dreamed of, secretly and barely admitting it to himself, would cause the woman he loved misery?

No. Catherine had to be wrong.

“I’ll help her,” he said. “Or I won’t go to London. There are men who never take their seat in the House of Lords.”

“You aren’t like them, James. You’re too responsible,” Catherine reminded him, her tone weary and her shoulders slumped. “And you can’t be there to hold her hand through everything. Think of all that our mother does for Papa. The parties and events.”

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Do you know how many wives of lords do nothing? Or only what they wish? Our mother’s choice to be a beacon of Society was just that: her choice. No one made her do it. No one expects it of the next baroness, either.”

“You have far too rosy a perspective on the situation,” Catherine said with a sad shake of her head. “There are too many obstacles for Jessica to overcome.”

“And she’s strong enough to face as many of them as she wishes,” James countered. “With me to support her. And I thought you would be there, too, as her friend.” He glared at his sister, confounded by her complete lack of faith in her dearest friend. The person as close to her as a sister. “Don’t you believe in her?”

Catherine winced. “I do. But there is a difference between letting her find her way and forcing her into the center of others’ attention.”

His jaw tightened and he scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Do you really have such a high opinion of our family? Our father is a baron in the House of Lords. That is the lowest rung in the peerage. You know that, don’t you? I’m not a duke, bringing home a duchess. I’m not even a baron yet. Jessica will have time. She won’t be the center of anything unless she wishes it. We are insignificant in more ways than we stand out.”