Page 77 of The Gods Order

My gaze locks onto Meridamus.

“Happy now?”

His grin is infuriating.

“Yes, actually.”

The silence around us shatters as I snatch my power back. Sound snaps back into existence from every direction at once. They study me for a long moment. I take the realm’s deepest breath as I square my shoulders. I focus on Meridamus first.

“You are and always will be Meridamus to me. I know you’re the God of Consequence and my godfather all in one.”

I don’t let the pleased twinkle in his eyes piss me off. I still have more to say. I turn my attention to Val.

“I do acknowledge you are my father and the God of Boundaries. One and the same. But this goes for both of you…”

They shift and the small smiles that were tugging at the corners of their lips fade away.

“I don’t know either of you. I’ve never known you truly and I don’t trust you. I don’t know when I will. Just because I can say out loud who you are to me, that doesn’t mean that’s how I feel in my heart. This is me accepting those things because they are factual. This isn’t emotional acceptance. Anyone can be a father. It takes more than that to be a dad. Neither of you is that to me. Understand that just because you held those titles at one time in my life, you don’t hold them any longer.”

Emotions clog my throat when their features crumble. My heart thuds uncontrollably against my rib cage and its pulse continues to pick up speed. Pain twists across my chest, but I refuse to take the words back.

“You are Val and you are Meridamus.”

The color drains from Val’s face and his shoulders cave in like I just slid a sword through his stomach. His throat bobs twice as he swallows down either emotions or the words he wants to say. Meridamus’s jaw clenches.

Neither of them looks like Beginning Gods right now.

They look like ashamed men.

“W-we understand,” Val mumbles.

A trembling breath leaves my lips and my soul shivers in my chest.

“Let’s go home and take a breath,” Kyzen says quietly as he lays his hand against my lower back.

I hold Val’s gaze for a heartbeat before nodding and taking two steps away.

“We can pick training back up later if you—”

My breath is snatched from my lungs faster than I can blink and my fingers curl into Kyzen’s shirt, cutting his words off. My knees crash into the ground as my soul screams out in absolute agony.

Fuck. That pain wasn’t just from that emotional moment.

“Thayla.”

My name rips from multiple throats, but I focus on Kyzen as he kneels and cups my cheeks.

“Who?” he asks.

“C-Creed.”

Creed

10

Never thought I’d admit it, but the Court is off without Gladian here.

It’s not bad. Just different.