Page 285 of Breathe Like Hell

Mila dragged me with her into the bedroom, where she had several dresses laid out on the bed. Ivan and Ekaterina were getting married in his parents’ backyard over the weekend—it was just a very small family ceremony, but I was invited—and I’d decided now that I did want to go.

“If we could bring a date, I would ask Eric,” she said, laughing.

“Are you serious? I’m honestly unsure these days. It’s been a while since you’ve seen him.” I couldn’t stop myself from giggling with her.

“Oh, you know.” She waved her hand. “He’s like my celebrity crush. Never goes away.”

“He’s not a celebrity, though, Mils. He might be willing to have dinner with you,” I said, then actually considered it. Would Eric want to get dinner with Mila? Maybe. But I wasn’t entirely convinced he’d want it to be a date. While Mila might be into the age gap thing, I didn’t know if he was. Perhaps I could ask him.

“I don’t want dinner. I just want to fuck,” she informed me.

“I thought you wanted to go bowling with him.”

“Okay, whatever. I don’t know what I want.” She sighed and flopped on the bed. “Do you want to wear any of these dresses? The one I’m wearing is hanging there.” Mila pointed to a dress hanging on the back of her closet door.

“I’m sure any of them will be fine.” I joined her on the bed, being careful not to lay on any of the dresses and rumple them. “You pick for me.”

“Well, I always like you in black, but I don’t think you should wear that to an outdoor summer wedding. Right? That’s a thing. So, this? Blue?”

Mila pointed to a muted blue dress, not too fancy.

“I like it.”

“It’s settled, then.” She grabbed her phone off the charger then rolled onto her stomach. Her thumbs tapped rapidly over the screen, but I saw her eyes sliding over in my direction. “Are you still…hooking up with that guy?” She grinned. “Mason? I know it’s been a while since you mentioned him.”

Despite our few hangouts recently, we had not discussed my love life at all.

I blew out a long breath.

“Actually, yes.”

“Good!” she screamed. “I was actually worried you broke up, since you were so sad. But I’m happy that’s not the case. He’s really fucking hot, Kota.”

“I know. We almost broke up, but no. Doing much better now.” I considered just telling her about Micah right then, but I still didn’t have a good picture to show her. I could show the tiny one in my locket, all grainy and black and white from the school printer, or the one I’d taken on my phone, but in that one he was covered in black veining. Neither one felt like the appropriate introduction for the other love of my life. I could wait a little longer.

“That makes me really happy for you” she said, her voice genuine.

“Are you doing well? Med school good?” I asked, hoping to shift the conversation away from myself for a minute.

“It is what it is, you know?” She was lying on her back now, phone on her chest as she stared up at the ceiling. I traced her side profile with my eyes. Her cute nose, full lips, the few freckles on her cheeks. She had brown eyes, like Mason, but bigger. Doe eyes.

“Does that mean good or bad?” I questioned, rolling to lay on my back, too.

“Mostly good. It’s stressful, though. That same cardiothoracic gunner bitch is in another class with me. I’m jealous you’re out of school now.” She slid her hand across the comforter and fuzzy blanket, her pinkie brushing mine. I interlocked them. “I wish I was not doing school.”

“So far, post grad has not been as fun as I’d hoped,” I admitted. “I obviously don’t have a job besides the gas station or anything. And I’ve been a shitty friend to you for a while.”

“You’re not a shitty friend, Dakota.” Mila turned her head to look at me. I met her eye, biting my lower lip to stop it from quivering.

“Yes, I am. I don’t want you to tell me that I’m not—I don’t want you to have to lie to me to spare my feelings, or anything. I haven’t been here for you for fucking months, Mils.”

“But that’s okay,” she reassured me. “Shit happens. You’re going through things.”

“So are you,” I reasoned.

“Meh. Just school. Thankfully, I’ve not been tormented by a man in a while.”

“That’s good.” I managed a small laugh. “I do feel bad, though. I know I’ve been off. I’m working on it.”