Eazy heard her, but he was annoyed as he removed the salmon pan from the burner and went to stir his grits again.
“What else sweet you have today? And what you mean am I sure that’s all it is?”
“I heard Dr. Burton, and I do not want to spend the rest of this pregnancy on no damn diet. I had a sandwich and soup for lunch with Toni today and water.” She twisted the cap from her bottle and tipped it to her mouth. “And I’m talking about Niva.”
Eazy made her a plate, which she was starving for as she settled at the counter.
“What about her?”
“She mentioned spending time with you. At your office.” Lotus sat up straight and said a quick prayer over her food.
“When did you see Niva?”
“So, she did see you at your office? Is this a new occurrence? Or is this why you’re spending nights at Summit and Taci’s suddenly?”
“Really, Lo?” His face balled into contempt.
“Did you see her or not, Eazy?”
“When I got to work today, she was there,” he admitted, resting his hands against the counter.
“And?”
“And nothing. She was on some bullshit, and I told her she needed to figure her shit out.”
“So, nothing else happened? ’Cause I saw the piece of fabric she was wearing.”
“You talking to me about keeping secrets?”
Lotus scoffed and shook her head. She knew it was going to come back around to her and the Evren situation. He wasn’t going to let that go. Meanwhile, he got to carry on with his ex however the fuck he wanted. Eazy went to the sink to do the dishes, and Lotus cut into her salmon with her fork before taking a bite and watching him. He wrapped up quickly, picking up a towel to dry his hands and staring at her with a tight frown. Lotus was starving, so she wasted no time clearing her plate and trying to ignore him.
“I’mma head out.” He paused at her side and knelt to kiss her belly, softening her.
“Goodnight,” she whispered, emotions toying with her.
A deep ache formed in her chest, like she couldn’t breathe as she dropped her fork against her plate. Eazy saw how she studied her remaining food, and he hated to be the one to put that energy there. He also didn’t know what to say to her, and he didn’t want to make things worse. Shaking his head, he sauntered around her to the doorway.
“So, is this all we have to look forward to now?” Lotus asked when he picked up his phone on the counter behind her and paused. “Is this what our son has to look forward to?” She kept her back to him.
“Lo—”
“No, Eazy! Don’t Lo, me, okay! I get it. I fucked up not telling you the extent of the Evren situation, but it wasn’t to be on no sneaky shit or to lie to you purposely. I was honestly trying to leave that behind me and focus on us. You’re making it like I was fucking that nigga behind your back or something or lied to you about whose baby this is. He’s crazy and delusional, and I just wanted to leave it where it was. I didn’t want you doing something that could possibly take you from what we were building either.”
Silence. Eazy stuffed his cell into his pocket. He heard the hurt in her voice.
“Maybe I was wrong. Maybe whatever this is with us isn’t what I thought it was.”
“Lock the house up.” Eazy grabbed his key fob with his keys on the counter and slid them in his pocket.
Lotus sighed heavily when she heard the front door slam shut behind him. She put her scraps in their trash bin, washed her plate, and went to lock the front door after he’d gone. With her back against the door, she observed the house in all its barely moved in glory. Unpacking and setting things up was something she took comfort in. She hoped and prayed he saw the effort she was putting in since he’d also made it a point to start the nursery set up with the crib he’d put together. She had to believe he wasn’t moving in vain and that Eazy was working his way toward forgiving her.
The house was too damn quiet after he left. So, Lotus went upstairs to put his hoodie on over her attire. She unpacked and arranged a few things, then grabbed some yogurt from the fridge to indulge in. Deliveries arrived like clockwork and Eazy brought most of them in when he arrived, so there were even more boxes in the hallway. According to her order status, she still had one pending until later tonight, and it was about ten stops away. A half-assembled lamp was in a corner, and on the table were brand new dishes still wrapped in the paper from the box they came in.
SZA floated through the surround sound speakers as she sat barefoot and cross legged in the middle of her new living room floor. Surrounded by boxes, bubble wrap, decorative pillows she’d already regretted buying, and enough crumpled packing paper to convince somebody she’d moved into a department store rather than a house, Lotus tried to unwind. Laptop resting against the swell of her stomach, she stared at an oversized sectional currently in her ridiculous cart. Curtains. Barstools. Nursery items she wouldn’t need for months, a rug she kept adding and removing because she still hadn’t decided on the couch.
“Absolutely not,” Lotus muttered.
Four thousand dollars for a couch was disrespectful. She couldn’t believe she’d even added it. The baby shifted, and Lotus looked down.