Page 68 of Home Is Where You Are

Instead of running away, now I was running toward the future I envisioned for myself so long ago.

A breakthrough happened while talking with Holden, and I wasn’t going to waste a second of trying to right the wrongs that occurred by me leaving.

But first, I needed to unpack my belongings from Aspen and Dylan’s moving truck, and see them off.

I was ready to hold my head high and reclaim my place on the ranch, and maybe if I played my cards right I could reclaim the heart of the man I’d loved my whole life.

Once I got back to the house, I raced inside and up the stairs. It was still early and knowing Aspen and Dylan, they were still asleep.

Quietly, I opened the door to find Aspen still curled up in bed. I tiptoed over to the bed and sat down on the side of the bed.

“Time to get up, sleepyhead,” I whispered as I softly shook her shoulder.

She pulled the pillow from under her head and hit me with it in the face.

I giggled as I tossed the pillow to the side and shook her once more.

“Why must you wake me so early,” she grumbled as she reluctantly sat up in bed and rubbed her eyes.

“I’ve been up for a while. Now it’s time for you and Dylan to wake up. I’ve got something to tell y’all, and then I figured we could unpack the moving truck. I know y’all wanted to get an early start to the day.”

“Who’s going to wake up Dylan?” she huffed as she stretched and moved the hair out of her face.

“Not it,” I said as I moved across the bed and sat with my back against the wall.

“I should make you do it since this is your idea.” She laughed as she got off the bed and walked into the Jack and Jill bathroom.

I rang my hands together as I waited for them to return.

I breathed in for four, held it for seven, and blew out the breath for another eight.

You can do this.

I kept repeating that to myself until Aspen returned with a sleepy Dylan. They both sat on the bed, Aspen on one side, Dylan on the other.

I took one of their hands in each of mine. Tears pooled in my eyes as I took another deep breath and began to tell them about the importance of today. They knew I’d lost a daughter, but it helped to talk about the struggles of the day. I told them all about the decision to get my tattoos, tattoos they’d never seen before.

Aspen moved first and pulled me into her arms. Dylan followed, hugging me from behind.

And it was there, in the embrace of my best friends that I finally began my journey to heal from the tragic loss of my little girl.

Aspen pulled back first, taking her thumbs and wiping away the tears on my face.

“You didn’t have to keep that part of yourself from either of us. But I understand why you did. From here on out, no more secrets. We’re your best friends. We want to be there for you. Always,” she replied. I nodded.

I had the best friends a girl could ask for.

Dylan remained quiet, his arms still wrapped around me from behind. When he pulled back, he stilled and I knew at that moment that he saw the tattoo on my shoulder.

“It looks so real,” he whispered.

I shivered when his fingertip traced the outline of her tiny handprint.

“I researched for the best tattoo artist near campus for that reason. I wanted it to look as realistic as possible. He did an amazing job. Better than I ever envisioned.”

“I’m so glad you finally showed us. We’ll always be there for you,” Dylan said.

I turned to face him and hugged him back. He was the softest, kindest person I’d ever met, and I hoped he never lost the best part about him.