Page 55 of Shattered Dreams

For a moment, Paul is quiet, his gaze searching mine.

“Maybe,” he says carefully.“It’s… confusing but not at the same time.”

“Yeah,” I agree. “Which doesn’t make sense.”

“No, it doesn’t. Like.. I know how I feel about you, and in some ways, it’s not all that different, but…” He twists his lips, letting out another sigh before he continues. “I also know how I feel when I’m with you. I know being next to you feels different than it used to, and I’m fine with that. I know that I like kissing you—a lot more than I probably should.” He lets out a nervous laugh, and I don’t miss the blush staining his cheeks. Something about it makes me feel less worried, less scared. “When I’m with you…” He huffs out a low breath. “When we’re together, everything feels good. But it’s just…”

“Weird?”

He chuckles. “Maybe a little, yeah. Because it’s… unexpected. I never thought… you know…”

I nod. “Definitely unexpected. And I get it. I never thought we’d be here either.”

“But you’re okay with it? Being here, I mean.”

I think about his words and answer him truthfully because this is Paul. If there’s one person in the world I can be honest with, it’s him, and this—what’s happening between us—doesn’t change that.

“I think so, yes.”

The kitchen goes quiet for a moment, and I move into his space, barely an inch. Wordlessly, he looks up at me, his thumb rubbing circles on my wrist.

“Me too,” he says firmly, taking my hand.

“Which is why we need to figure something out. We can’t keep hiding it, and honestly, there is so much going on I don’t think hiding it is even smart.” I link my fingers between his, focusing on the warmth of his skin; the way his fingers lace between mine. I squeeze them softly, if only to reiterate to myself they’re real. That this… us, is real.

“I can agree with that. So… who do we tell first?” he asks, his thumb brushing over my knuckles slowly.

Shaking my head, I think over our options and the best way to do this.

“I’d say either my parents or Amelia. I think the conversation with the kids might be a little more difficult, so telling the others first will give us some practice.”

“That makes sense, but I don’t want to wait forever to tell them. I think if we’re going to be open about this, then we need to just do it. Not make a big deal out of it.”

“Rip the Band-Aid off.”

He nods.“Let’s flip a coin,” he says, standing up and digging in his pockets. He frowns. “You got a coin?”

I dig around in the junk drawer and find a quarter. I hand it over. He rubs it between his palms and goes to toss it up.

“Wait!” I say. He startles “Sorry, but who is heads and who is tails?”

“Oh. Good point. Uh… you pick.”

I roll my eyes and say, “Fine. My parents are tails.”

He tosses the coin in the air, and we watch it fall to the floor. When it stops moving, we stare at it for a minute before looking at each other.

Chapter Twenty

Paul

I used to dread Sundays because that meant the weekend was over; another reminder that my time with my son went by way too fast. I’d take him over to Amelia’s after dinner, say goodbye, and head home to my too-quiet apartment and spend the night catching up on TV shows or meal-prepping for the week. But now? Sundays might be one of my favorite days of the week.

I wake up to the sound of laughter so loud it reaches upstairs. The air smells like bacon and maple, with a hint of chocolate and coffee, and the sunlight pours through the bedroom, lighting up the empty side of the bed. The only thing that would make this morning better is if Dre would sleep in like me, so we could relax together, but he likes to get up early and make breakfast, especially for the kids.

One glance at the clock, and I realize it’s nearing nine-thirty, so I need to get moving because I told Amelia I’d bring Maddox over this afternoon per her request.

I shower, dress, and make my way downstairs, and have to stop for a moment, just to take it all in.