Page 91 of Relapse

I managed to force out a whisper of the words, “Damian…” but it was as good as silent.

David released me briefly, and I coughed, barely registering how much air I had been drained of. There were no moments to recover. David punched me in the chest twice, right across my sternum and my body was stunned. I’d been in fights before, but this was enough to leave me immobilized. I laid there, clutching my throat in a daze, as David seized me by the back of my shirt, like a dog grabbed by the nape of its neck, and hauled me off the bed. I tumbled to the floor.

I was still gasping for air when it clicked inside me. What he wanted. Even through my panic, I knew.

David’s zipper came down easily. He’d done it a million times before. The memory was distinct within my psyche.

“Suck my dick, little bitch,” he demanded.

The memory was like a knife twisting inside my soul. Little me could still hear the words: “Suck me.”

I couldn’t fight back then. Couldn’t have fathomed escaping his grasp. He was so much bigger than me when he first broke my body.

David landed a rough slap across the face, breaking me from my trance and causing my head to snap to the side. Instead of his zipper I was looking at the carpet now. My neck burned from the force of the whiplash.

The memory broke, but I was still in hell.

“Do it,” he whispered. “Make your sick little mouth worth something. Since you don’t want to talk.”

I looked up to face the monster’s sadistic smile and said what younger me never could.

“Go fuck yourself.”

David growled, shoving my face forward. I locked my mouth shut.

“You’ll do it,” he threatened, ripping my head upwards so that I was looking at him again.

“The fuck I will,” I seethed, spitting at his feet. “If you put your filthy cock in my mouth,” I made sure he understood my last words with crystal clarity, “You’re not getting it back.”

There was a brief pause in him then. I knew he didn’t expect the level of defiance. But I’d die before I put his disgusting appendage in my mouth. I glared up at him with as much hatred as I could muster, my hands clenched into fists where they rested on my thighs.

I decided then, I wasn’t going to wait around for his response. I jolted to the side, off of my knees and to my feet. David growled and I knew he was right behind me. I was almost to the door when I was shoved hard from behind. I stumbled, my shoulder slamming into the doorframe as I attempted to catch myself. Before I could regain my footing, he was on me, shoving me to the ground, his weight pinning me from behind.

I thrashed wildly, bucking my hips and kicking out, trying to unbalance him. He absorbed my struggles, his breath hot and angry in my ear as he forced me down onto my stomach. I managed to twist beneath him, landing a desperate elbow to his ribs. He cursed, his grip faltering for a split second.

It was enough.

I tried to crawl away, but he grabbed my ankle, keeping me from getting far. I flipped myself over onto my back with a grunt of effort, but his knees slammed down on either side of my hips, trapping me as he mounted me.

“Leave me alo—” The pressure of David’s hands clamping down on my throat choked the last of my words away.

“Have it your way,” David hissed. “It’s been awhile since I’ve made you cry.”

My head was pounding like a drum, my body internally pleading for me to find air. To find safety.

I found that the more I struggled, the more the world started to fade. Each failed breath made me lightheaded, and dark splotches slithering into my vision with each pressing beat of my heart.

The tunnel of black grew in size and it was almost…welcoming. Better than what would come next. I went limp in David’s grasp, unable to see him anymore, or my surroundings, and allowed the shadows to overtake me.

Further and further I went…

With a strangulated gasp the world shot color and light back into my vision.

I heard David chuckle behind my wheezing. “Not that easy,” he taunted, releasing me just enough to keep me awake.

“Please—” I croaked, the words scratching their way up my throat. I had no bargaining skills left up my sleeves. I couldn’t even fight at this point. I just needed him off of me. I needed to breathe.

David tugged at my pants. I could feel him through my clothes. He was hard.