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Chapter Thirty-Four

SOULFUL HURTZ

Three months later

“I mean damn, every couple of seconds your phone keeps ringing. What’s that about?” I looked over at Era and just shook my head. Pulling my ringing phone out of my pant pocket, I tossed it across the bed. It landed right in front of her. She looked at me like she was battling picking it up. I told her the code, then dug in my other pants pocket to give her my business phone as well. I let her know that both of the codes was the same and walked off leaving her to do whatever it was that would make her feel better.

Despite my own trust issues from Jocelyn, I never made shit unfair to her by asking weird suspect ass questions. I had to remind myself though, that Era was a woman. Women showed their emotions differently. She got burned bad by a nigga she put her trust in and thought that she was going to take that shit out on me.

“How do I know if you didn’t delete shit?” I dropped my jeans then lifted my shirt up next. I was tired as hell, all day I had been in the projects gathering my football team that I had start coaching. Niggas was ignorant and it took a lot of breaking up fights and calming niggas that had beef down.

I ran a couple of plays and did some practice with them. After that was done, I had to speed across town to make my appointment with Era. I wouldn’t miss an appointment at all because I was just as excited as her to know what all was going on with my baby boy.

“Yo, you can’t even be serious right now, Era. We ain’t even established shit and I’m over here trying to prove shit that I don’t even got to prove to you. Get out yo feelings and stop looking at me like I’m that bitch ass nigga Devin.” I gave her my back. Today I wasn’t about to chase or do no ass kissing.

I had feelings for Era, and always wanted to make her happy and she did the same for me. Every time I tried to take this shit between us a little further she’d recoil and back out on some scary shit. I respected that and gave her all the time she needed. This was really considered our first argument and I should have took it easy on her.

She was just as stressed as me and also busy. Every week she was doing something, in the studio every day, recording songs and making appearances. She even started traveling, her followers went up and so did her money. I was happy and worried at the same time. Worried because her doctor already stated that she was high risk, they told her that she should scale back on half of her daily activities.

Era acted as if she wasn’t even pregnant. If it wasn’t for me seeing her ultrasounds, I wouldn’t even believe that she was pregnant. She didn’t show at all, her stomach wasn’t as solid as I thought it should be either. Era glowed more and more each day and she looked pretty as hell. She was also the face of BBWs, they loved her like they loved Lizzo.

I think it was starting to bother her that the world couldn’t know just yet about us even though my divorce was finalized with Jocelyn. See Era was new to this industry shit. Fans loved to make up their own theories not really knowing the truth. Creating fake stories and putting celebrities inside of label boxes not realizing that this was people’s real lives.

I didn’t want that for Era, she had a big bright future ahead of her and I wanted her to do well. See the music industry would eat her alive if they found out she was carrying a baby by me. They’d start calling her home wreckers and all kinds of shit. I could be a selfish nigga and make it known now but I really wanted Era to think about the shit.

I didn’t know if she would be able to take that kind of pressure. Me personally I didn’t give a fuck, I just wanted to be thoughtful and not add to her stress.

Era had left out the bathroom and she probably took her mad ass home. Who knows, I’d call her once I was situated out of the shower and running the rest of my errands. Jocelyn had been on some weird ass shit lately and my suspicions was telling me that she had relapsed again.

I wasn’t even prepared to deal with that shit, to be honest, I was tired of dealing with Jocelyn all together. Half the time, when I went by the house that I once shared with her, shit was a mess. Jocelyn had a maid that came once every week and she lived alone in that big ass house so I was confused on to why shit was so fucked up whenever I did come by.

I didn’t talk much to her, I just came to get a good look at her and then I’d leave after leaving her an allowance for the week. She’d try to dress up and make herself look all super sexy and tell me lies like she was going to rehab and looking for a job. I highly doubted that shit but I encouraged her because I truly wanted what was best for her. I didn’t wish bad on Jocelyn even though she hurt me.

I wanted her to be able to stand on her own two feet and eventually fade away from me. I threw on some Nike Basketball shorts and A black Nike shirt, slipping into my Nike Sandals, I walked out of the bedroom with my eyes glued to my phone. I was already sending Era a text, telling her that we needed to talk. I left an apology out because I wasn’t wrong. I needed her to woman up and get with the program.

Just like women said men expected wifey-type shit from them when they were only boyfriend and girlfriend, is how I felt with Era right now. She wanted to question me like I was her nigga but then backpedal when I wanted to take shit to another level. Always bringing up our past and how we both just got out of some hurtful shit.

That didn’t matter to me because I really had a new set of feelings for her and Jocelyn didn’t get in the way of that at all.

“Soulful, Luv is going on a date tonight.” Passion blurted out soon as I walked into the family room to get to the front door. Luv tossed a pillow at Passion head and she fell out into a fit of giggles. I didn’t find shit funny, I put my phone in my pocket and just stood there frozen.

“What’s a date? Going to get your nails or hair done? A school date for a test? I ain’t really understanding that shit.” My jaw clenched tight. Passion sat up as Luv smacked her lips.

“You always running your fucking mouth, Passion! Ain’t nobody say shit when you lied to Teddy telling him you were going to Monique house but you was laid-“ Passion almost fell off the couch trying to get to Luv. She jumped on her and covered her mouth and pleaded with her. My heart fell right into my ass, I felt my whole chest constrict and start to beat wild.

“Laid up where? Passion… you ain’t even eighteen? You want me to fucking kill somebody?” I marched over to both of them as fear became evident in their eyes. I started to automatically blame myself. Lately I’ve been so focused on myself that it felt like I was losing my closeness with my sisters.

They’d come to me for money and tell me when they were coming and going. For the most part they were always talking to Roberto or Sovereign.

“Who were you laid up with Passion?” I tried to soften my approach, I didn’t like them looking at me as if I would actually lay a finger on them when I never have, even though growing up and raising them I came close to doing so. Especially with Luv, she was always the one to test me and do shit that she had no business doing. I just always felt like it wasn’t my place to raise my hands and discipline them. I always found more healthier ways, like taking the things they liked away until they would straighten their act. That shit worked too and would get their asses right in line.

“I wasn’t laid up with no one, Luv is just being a hater right now.” Passion eyes were blinking rapidly, and it lowkey pained me that she was lying to me right now.

I took a seat across from them and calmed myself, my mind was bouncing back and forth between Passion then Luv. I knew they both were growing and that they would eventually like the opposite sex. I guess I didn’t see this shit coming so fast and so soon. These were the times that I wished like hell my mom was around to assist me with them. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I looked back and forth between both girls.

“Passion and Luv, y’all gotta talk to me. I don’t know what’s going on and my own house and I don’t like that shit.” I felt myself getting even madder.

“Well, you have been dealing with a lot. We haven’t, just been having fun, you know?” Luv adjusted herself and sat up straight. She was always the leader and the outspoken one. I sat up too but to get a really good look at my sisters. Luv looked like a grown woman, that was to be expected. She was Eighteen and she looked every bit of it. Passion still had a baby face but her body indicated that she was nearing that grown woman mark.