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Because she’d be counting on him.

His stomach clenched again, the knot growing tighter. He could barely feel his fingers, but he managed to type out a couple of quick messages to update Shaina on his ETA.

Ash (12:06 p.m.): Just hit the Grapevine. I’ll be there before 2

Ash (12:06 p.m.): Bri is still okay?

He didn’t have to wait long for a response. Shaina’s messages popped up almost immediately.

Shaina (12:06 p.m.): You made good time. She’s doing well, just went down for a nap. The nurses here are great and love her

Shaina (12:07 p.m.): Drive safe. We’ll be here with her the whole time. Remember, Californians drive at least fifteen mph over the speed limit

Shaina (12:07 p.m.): Although I told you to be safe, didn’t I? So, drive safe but fast? lol See you soon

It was impossible to hold his tears in or stifle the weak laugh that escaped him, though it came out more like a strangled breath. He’d already been pushing ten to fifteen miles per hour over the speed limit the whole way down from Seattle, going with the flow of traffic. And he wasn’t sure it could be considered safe for him to be driving at all right now, even if he’d been going the speed limit. Grief didn’t exactly put him in the right frame of mind for careful driving. Nor did the lack of sleep.

God, he was exhausted. But that didn’t matter right now. Getting to Los Angeles mattered. Getting there for Bri, his three-month-old niece who’d just lost her mother, that was what mattered.

Another sound escaped him, but this time it was one of those painful, emotional sobs that was impossible to stop. His chest constricted as he closed his eyes against the tears, and he willed himself to be strong. For Bri. No matter how much he was hurting right now, she had to be his priority.

He forced his eyes open and stared down at the phone for a few more seconds. Then he typed out a short text to Shaina to let her know he’d be careful, made sure the navigation was set to UCLA Children’s Hospital, and pulled back out onto the freeway, heading south toward Los Angeles.

“She’s . . .”

“She’s happy to see you.” Shaina set her hand gently on Ash’s shoulder, though he barely felt it as he stared down at the smiling baby cradled in his arms.

His throat was dry, and he couldn’t seem to form any words. She was gorgeous. Beautiful big eyes and chubby pink cheeks and a head of thick dark hair. And she cooed and giggled and seemed to try reaching up toward him before balling her hand into a fist and stuffing it right in her mouth.

“That’s . . . that’s new, isn’t it?” he choked out, ignoring the tears that slid down his cheeks. “Stuffing her hand in her mouth like that? And when did she get so big? And how does she look—how does she look so much like—”

He snapped his mouth shut to keep a sob from escaping and closed his eyes for a moment as he held his niece a little bit tighter. Next to him, Shaina wrapped her arm around his shoulders.

“She started doing that the day before yesterday,” Shaina said quietly, and Ash could only nod.

He managed to open his eyes again, and Bri was staring up at him now, her gray-blue eyes so curious and innocent. He tilted his head down and brought her up slightly to kiss her forehead as a shudder coursed through him.

He’d made it. Barely. The doctor had just finished clearing Bri for discharge when he’d arrived, and the social worker wasn’t expected for another thirty minutes or so. And Shaina had already gotten him up to speed on all the tests they’d done—everything showing that Bri was perfectly healthy and happy, despite having spent a number of hours alone in her crib before Shaina had gotten home from class and found Ashlynn lying on the floor not five feet away.

She’d died quickly, they’d said. Quickly and most likely painlessly. Her heart had just stopped. Sudden cardiac arrest was very uncommon in young adults, and there had been no signs or symptoms, no indication that Ashlynn had even had a heart problem. Hell, they didn’t even have a family history of heart problems or anything that might have suggested such. And the initial autopsy results had shown she’d had no drugs in her system—which Ash could have told them and he was sure Shaina had told them.

His sister, for all anyone knew, had been the picture of health.

Which only made this so much more difficult and devastating.

Bri closed her eyes and let out what sounded like a contented sigh as she continued sucking on her fist, and Ash watched her suckling gradually slow until her hand slipped out of her mouth. He swallowed hard and looked up at Shaina’s parents, Joanna and Henry Waller, who sat on a small sofa on the other side of the hospital room. They both looked not much better than Shaina—tired and sad and a little pale.

Ash shook his head and blinked back yet more tears. “I-I don’t know the first thing about taking care of a baby,” he admitted. He tried not to let his voice crack, but he knew he couldn’t hide all of his emotions from them—his pain and uncertainty and fear were clearly etched on his face, he was sure.

Joanna smiled softly at him, although he could see the strain in her brown eyes, and she stood, letting go of her husband’s hand. Her petite frame looked fragile, but when she walked over to him and reached up to touch his cheek, he felt all her warmth and certainty.

“It’s scary, I know,” Joanna said gently. She lowered her eyes to the baby in his arms, and her smile softened even more. “Even when you’re prepared for parenthood, it’s still scary. But the most important thing is love, sweetie. And you’ve got plenty of that. You’ll figure everything else out.”

From the other side of the room, Henry stood, and Ash lifted his eyes to meet the older man’s. For the last several years, Henry had been almost like a father figure to him, and now, as he blinked back more tears and watched Henry cross the room toward them, Ash couldn’t help but feel lucky to be surrounded by people he knew loved him. And Bri.

The Wallers were as close to family as he had. He and Ashlynn had grown up living next door to them in Renton, just outside of Seattle, and Shaina had been his and his sister’s best friend for as long as he could remember. Then, when their parents had died in a car accident when he and Ashlynn were both seventeen, just over three years ago, the Wallers had taken them in. They still helped and supported him, financially and otherwise, even after they’d moved here to Los Angeles and Ash had stayed up in Seattle to attend the University of Washington.

It meant so much to him that they were here now. All of them together again.