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“I don’t have marriage problems,” I said. “I have marriage rage.”

Lennon, Emma, and Tamilee exchanged a glance, but it was Holly who bluntly said, “That seems like a really dumb mistake to make. Why didn’t you talk to an attorney?”

Emma’s green eyes went wide. Tamilee rubbed her forehead with a quiet groan and shook her head. Lennon pursed her lips and shot Holly a look of annoyed disbelief. But I just laughed. So Holly wasn’t a girl’s girl. That was fine. I hadn’t really expected her to be.

“That’s not how this works, Holly.” I took her glass, poured a generous amount of wine, and handed it back to her. “First comes griping, then comes truth. We’re still in the griping part, so I need you to be supportive, and if you can’t be supportive, then be silent. Let me bitch and moan a little, and then I’ll be ready to be reasonable.”

Holly’s black hair swished around her shoulders as she shrugged. “Okay.”

But now I wasn’t in the mood to gripe. I couldn’t stop thinking about that day when Kathleen Ashcroft had knocked on my mom’s door, two weeks after Seb had abandoned me in D.C. I’d stayed at our townhouse in Georgetown for all of a week before fleeing to my mom’s house in West Oakland. About a week after that, Kathleen showed up on our doorstep. I had been…not in great shape. Heartbroken, confused, unshowered. Maybe I had misunderstood?

No. I couldn’t have misunderstood that.

“It doesn’t make sense.” I took a quick swig of wine, then wiped my mouth on my thumb. “There’s no way we’re married. It’s not possible.”

Tamilee frowned. “Please tell me that boy didn’t leave you thinking he took care of it. Did Seb do that? Because I don’t care what history we have, I will take that boy by the balls with these two hands and I’ll—” She squeezed her hands into fists and shook them.

“No!” I yelped, wincing on Seb’s behalf. “He didn’t mention divorce at all. He said he was leaving and he wasn’t coming back. That’s it.” I had wondered about that, about Seb not saying he wanted a divorce or discussing it at all, and then I’d looked into Kathleen’s sharp blue eyes and realized, oh, that’s why.

I swallowed the last of my wine and set the empty glass aside. Two drinks were my limit when I was happy. One drink was my limit when I was sad—and that wasn’t because I was scared my genes were going to bite my ass and convince me to shoot heroin. I just didn’t want to be pathetic over a goddamn man. Crying was bad enough. Alcohol would have me getting him out of his clothes as fast as I could.

Even now, after everything.

With Seb sharing a bed with me every night, I was an alcoholic at a free wine tasting. The portions might be small, but they could still fuck up your life.

“Here’s the thing,” I said. “We didn’t get married in the U.S., but because we’re U.S. citizens, we had to file paperwork with the court to make it legal. Seb said he’d take care of it. I assumed he did because if Seb says he’ll do something, then he does it.”

Tamilee and Holly both nodded. They knew.

“Seb’s family is loaded,” I went on. “And Seb owns a stake in the defense contracting firm. It’s worth tens of millions of dollars. I would have signed a prenup if he had asked me to, but he didn’t ask. I didn’t think anything of it because I was romantic and stupid and so in love that divorce never occurred to me. But after he left, his mom paid me a visit.” I picked up my glass and swirled it like it wasn’t empty, then set it down again. “She told me Seb hadn’t filed the marriage paperwork because the family lawyers were still hammering out the details of the prenup. So, legally, we weren’t married.”

Emma sucked in air.

“That’s bullshit.” Lennon slammed her glass down on the soft dirt. “You exchanged vows and lived together as a married couple. I bet a judge would have awarded you at least a million.”

“I didn’t want his money.” It wasn’t the first time I had made that vow, and I snickered a little now, remembering the expression on Kathleen’s face when I practically spat those words at her. Then she’d rolled her eyes and said, Don’t be ridiculous, Lila. Everyone wants our money.

“Anyway, his mom agreed with you, Lennon. She said I could try my luck in court, and maybe I would get a sympathetic judge, but she had enough money to hire the best lawyers, and it would drag on so long that I would never see a dime of it. Instead, she offered me a hundred thousand to sign a document waiving any claim to Seb’s money.”

“Gross,” Lennon said. “Rich people are the worst. But at least you got—oh, god. You said no, didn’t you. Lila.” She clutched my shoulders. “Please tell me you took every goddamn cent she offered you.”

I looked away, chewing my lip. “I told her I would sign that document if Seb asked me face to face.”

Lennon groaned loudly. “How can we be the same species? There’s no high ground or moral superiority in refusing money. Rich people made that up so poor people won’t take what they are rightfully owed.”

“I wasn’t thinking straight!” I cried. “My husband had just left me, and I had moved back in with my mom. I didn’t want Kathleen to think I was a gold digger.”

But that wasn’t true. I didn’t give a damn what Kathleen thought about me. I just wanted to see Seb again, and any excuse would do.

“It doesn’t matter,” Holly said.

Lennon scoffed. “Sounds like something a rich person would say. A hundred grand fucking matters, Holly. For most people, that’s life-changing money.”

“No, I mean it doesn’t matter because the marriage is legal. If she wants a hundred grand, Seb will give it to her.” Holly paused, her dark eyes shifting sideways as she considered. “He’d give it to her even if the marriage wasn’t legal, actually. So…yeah. It doesn’t matter.”

Huh.

She was probably right.