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He looked up at her, his eyes bright, a grin on his face. “Then come with me! I heard another Highland woman went to the future with the man she fell in love with…and my friend Raghnall Mackenzie chose to leave this time for Bryanna, a woman from the future. It’s possible. Let’s go together, as soon as the storm ends. Come with me to the future. You won’t have to marry anyone, and I’ll help you adjust, and we’ll be together. You’ll be free.”
She stilled, unable to move. The words were seductive…going to the future with the love of her life, being free of her duty to her father and never having to face the consequences of her lost virginity…
She imagined those cars that moved without horses. The houses of glass and stone that anyone, not just nobles, could own. The world where women could decide their own futures and be free. Where a person’s birth did not define their worth.
She liked it. And she knew it was true because David had given her more freedom of choice than anyone in her life. Made her feel loved and valued and respected.
But that was only a dream. A wish that would never come true.
“I thank ye for the offer, David,” she whispered. “But I have a duty to my father. I need to keep Scotland safe and help bring the war with England to its end by marrying Philip Mowbray.”
His face wrinkled with pain. “Duty to your father?” He chuckled bitterly. “The father you’ve only spent a couple of days with in your life? The father who only calls for you when he needs you for political reasons?”
Every word was like a lash against her wound, hitting right where it hurt. He was saying out loud the exact words and doubts she’d thought to herself.
“You need to put yourself first, Anna,” he said. “You need to understand you are worth everything with or without his approval. Or anyone else’s.”
She sat up and shifted away from him. For the first time in a long time, she didn’t want to touch him or listen to him. Tears burned her eyes. “Ye dinna understand, David. Indeed, because as ye said, ye’re an outsider. Truth is, nae matter how much I dream, love is never an option for a woman like me. Nae love for myself and nae love for someone else. ’Tis nae something a bastart like me has a right to.”
CHAPTER 23
Despite her harsh words, Anna didn’t think she’d ever been so glad for a storm to continue. The wind and rain kept ravaging the countryside, the drumming of raindrops like music. Thunder and lightning returned. Even the short walk to the stables to take care of the horses was an ordeal.
They had made love again at night, passionate and hard, as though their bodies spoke—as though their bodies said they were sorry for their words and that they wanted to spend every moment clinging to each other, entwined, entangled forever.
They shared the MacDowell uisge and cooked. The remnants of the oats in the sacks in the corner were all moldy, but the mushrooms were edible and there were still somewhat dry but usable parsnips, wild carrots, and wild garlic in the root cellar. Together, they made a soup.
“Anna, are you all right?” David asked as she chopped wild carrots into tiny bits.
She cleared her throat and smiled at him. “I just worry what’s happening in Stirling. I’m supposed to meet Philip tomorrow. But we can’t leave during a storm like this. It would kill us out there.” What if Sir Philip was angry because she hadn’t arrived? What if they were fighting because of her, killing each other?
“Look,” David said, throwing cut parsnips into the boiling cauldron. “I wish it was different, our situation. And I know you do, too. We’ll never have this again. Tomorrow, hopefully, we’ll be able to leave. For now, let’s just…”
“Aye,” she said and grinned. “Let’s pretend like ’tis just ye and I, and there’s nae Philip, nae Father, and nae time travel.”
Day after day, Anna did her best to forget about the things she couldn’t change and enjoy her time with David. He told her about his life in the modern times—about the game he played, about running water and glass windows and light and warmth easily available in homes. There was no need to have castles because no one would come and try to take your home away. At least not in the country where he lived—United States, he called it. Trade and information seemed to be the biggest powers there.
People didn’t need to get married to form alliances; they could marry for love. It was an odd concept for her…one that she liked.
The good girl, the noble lady in her felt guilty for having sinned before marriage, and she knew God would punish her for that somehow. She would accept the punishment. It was worth it. She’d always remember these days of happiness, feel them like the beads of a rosary in her hands.
The rain battering the walls was like a shield around them, keeping the outside world at bay. At one point, she broke down. They were lying in bed after making love, sated and lazy and warm and heavy. Her head lay on his biceps as if it were a pillow, her hand and his intertwined.
“Dream with me, David,” she said as she kissed his hand. “What would our life be like together if ye did stay? What if ye could be happy here, with me? What if ye could accept this time for yer own? Just for a moment, please?”
He sighed. “It’s easy to imagine, sweetheart. I’d be the luckiest guy in Scotland. Being with a girl like you… We’d have a small estate somewhere, I think. A house like this or maybe a small castle to protect you. But in a better condition and near a loch.”
“Aye.” She giggled.
“I’d make love to you every night, go riding with you…”
“Swimming?” she asked, surprising herself. “Swimming doesna terrify me so much nae more.”
“Yeah.” He chuckled. “I’d love to go swimming with you. I’d teach you football, maybe we’d play together…teach our kids…”
He’d told her “kids” was not only used for baby goats in his time but for children, as well.
“Ye’d want to have bairns?”
