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"Do you want me to leave?" An obvious grimace appearing on my face.
"No!" She protested as loudly as she could. "No, I meant, why does my mother think you're here? I need to have my story straight before she gets back."
"Oh," I breathed, once again, relief burst through me; understanding replacing confusion. She still wants me here! Happiness swelled inside me like a balloon. "I came to Phoenix to talk some sense into you, to convince you to come back to Forks." I fixed my face, like I was trying to convince her myself, proving this lie was convincing. "You agreed to see me, and you drove out to the hotel where I was staying with Carlisle and Alice -- of course I was here with parental supervision," I infused innocently, "but you tripped on the stairs on the way to my room and... well, you know the rest. You don't need to remember any details, though; you have a good excuse to be a little muddled about the finer points."
Looking into her eyes I could see her mental processes whirling around before she spoke.
"There are a few flaws with that story. Like no broken windows," she said matter-of-factly.
"Not really," I chuckled lightly under my breath. "Alice had a little bit too much fun fabricating evidence. It's all been taken care of very convincingly -- you could probably sue the hotel if you wanted to. You have nothing to worry about," I assured her, caressing her cheek with the lightest of touches, letting her warmth envelope me. "Your only job now is to heal," I ordered.
I continued to trace my fingers around her magnificent face. Her heart began to jump around wildly, the monitor echoing the erratic palpitations.
"That's going to be embarrassing," she muttered.
This could be more amusing than I realized. Now her heart was beating loudly enough for both of us to hear with all of this equipment magnifying it. I chuckled.
"Hmm, I wonder..."
I leaned in, deliberately trying to hear her reaction; the beeping noise hammered quickly along with her heart before my cold lips even reached her warm ones. Her heart continued to beat a little faster as I slowly moved in for the kiss.
Gently, I reminded myself; placing my lips upon hers, sending a spine tingling sensation through me as she lightly moaned in pleasure. Her heart was racing before it gave a huge bound and then it stopped altogether. Panic hit. I pulled back instantly as the light beeping noise started again. Relief, a feeling that seemed to be recurring over and over today, swept over me.
"It seems that I'm going to have to be even more careful with you than usual," I grimaced.
"I was not finished kissing you," she grumbled. "Don't make me come over there."
Affection gushed up inside me and against my careful stature; a smile crept up my face at her obvious love for me. It was amazing that she still yearned to be with me like I craved to be with her. After everything I had done to her she still wished for a proximity that I was still reluctant to give her; I was filled with a trepidation that I would hurt her, break her, kill her somehow. Despite my thoughts, I still bent down to press my lips lightly to hers. The heat crept up my face and down my veins as it brought warmth to my cold heart.
In the hallway, I could hear a discussion being whispered.
"How long will it take before she wakes up?" Ren??e asked the nurse. Soon, please tell me soon!
"It's up to her, Mrs. Dwyer."
"Well, thanks anyways," she sounded defeated. Edward is still in there I bet ?C they have had enough time alone. Who knows what those crazy kids were up to before this accident happened.
I pulled out of our kiss.
"I think I hear your mother," I smiled.
"Don't leave me," she cried irrationally.
Terror was obvious in her deep brown eyes. "I won't," I promised solemnly, and then I smiled serenely. "I'll take a nap."
I jumped from the stiff plastic chair by her side to the turquoise artificial-leather recliner
at the foot of her bed, leaning it all the way back, and closing my eyes. I became a statue.
"Don't forget to breathe," she whispered mockingly. Going along with her humor I took a deep breath, my eyes remained closed.
Ren??e's light echoing footsteps moved towards the door before she lightly pressed against it, causing the door to crack open.
She's awake! Ren??e thought excitedly. Her eyes peeked through the space, hoping to sneak a peek at a possible conversation, eavesdropping before she opened the door all the way to rush towards Bella's open eyes.
"Mom!" Bella croaked out, her voice relieved.
Oh, my baby girl, Ren??e's mind was easing slightly. Through her eyes I could see my still form feigning sleep. Ah, he's asleep...but still here. Her annoyed thoughts became verbal. "He never leaves, does he?" she muttered.
"Mom, I'm so glad to see you!" Bella ignored her mom's spoken thought.
Ren??e's expression cleared, her eyes returning to her daughter. Forget Edward...my baby. My beautiful baby girl. She's awake. Tears flowed down Ren??e's cheeks as she bent down to hug Bella awkwardly.
"Bella, I was so upset!" Ren??e spluttered through her tears and other inarticulate sounds. I should have never, ever let her go to Forks. What was I thinking? I'm such a fool.
"I'm sorry, Mom. But everything's fine now, it's okay," Bella tried to reassure her.
She's sorry? I'm sorry! Everything's not okay. Look at her...all the bruises.
At Ren??e's thoughts, my stomach tightened sickeningly with pain. I felt a pang of unease. The bruises...the broken bones...they were my fault, no one else's. Sick images swam in my head and continued to come at me relentlessly. Every part of me ached with my idiocy ?C my ignorance ?C at what my clandestine existence ultimately brought to Bella. Thoughts of leaving her echoed through my head, but my love continued to pulse in my heart, my inability to leave her growing stronger. The ongoing battle continued to ensue inside me.
"I'm just glad to finally see your eyes open." Ren??e sat down at the end of Bella's bed.
Her eyes are so sparkly. To think that there was a possibility that they could never open again...she grew sick at the thought, letting it trail off to images of coffins and people dressed in black.
Struggling, I tried to push her images from my mind fiercely. My lurking doubts started resurfacing in my mind. I should leave Bella to her life, stop destroying her future.
"How long have they been closed?" Bella gasped, her mouth forming a little O of horror.
"It's Friday, hon, you've been out for a while."
"Friday?" Her voice was full of stunned disbelief.
The two worst days of my life.
I had to agree with Ren??e's thoughts, except they were the worst two days of my entire existence.
"They had to keep you sedated for a while, honey -- you've got a lot of injuries."
"I know," Bella winced.
"You're lucky Dr. Cullen was there. He's such a nice man... very young, though. And he
looks more like a model than a doctor..." If I wasn't married...
"You met Carlisle?" Bella interrupted her fantasy.
"And Edward's sister Alice. She's a lovely girl." The whole family is breath taking. What kind of food are they feeing them?
Only if she knew of the consequences of having our beauty and the blood we drink to continue our deplorable existence.
"She is," Bella agreed sincerely, unstinting devotion, love emitting from Bella's eyes in rays of emotion.
Suddenly I was in Ren??e's vision. Wow, she really does feel strongly for this family. But, what about this boy? He seems to be around much more than the rest.
"You didn't tell me you had such good friends in Forks," Ren??e said suspiciously, turning back to Bella but continuing to steal glances of me over her shoulder.
I wonder what their deal is...
Ren??e was busy stealing another glance over her shoulder when Bella moaned in pain. The lamentation of grief reached Ren??e's ears, her eyes quickly found Bella's. So did mine, flashing open as soon as her mom's attention was no longer on me, panic coursing through me.
"What hurts?" she demanded anxiously, voicing my same concerns. Her thoughts were full of a deep motherly concern, one full of love.
"It's fine," she tried to relieve our tension. "I just have to remember not to move."
Her words eased some of my panic. Closing my eyes again, I focused on her through Ren??e's thoughts.
Never again. She's not going back to Forks. Thank god for Phil's contract. She'll be so excited.
"Where's Phil?" Bella blurted out, almost as if she were reading her mother's mind too.
"Florida-- oh, Bella! You'll never guess! Just when we were about to leave, the best
news!"
"Phil got signed?" Bella interjected.
"Yes! How did you guess! The Suns, can you believe it?" She can finally move back home!
Deep down I could feel the hollowing of my insides along with the burning of my heart at the thought of Bella moving away, but it was the best thing she could do. She should leave, graduate high school, college...get married and have kids. Not stay with a vampire who could offer her no future.
"That's great, Mom," she replied in a questioning enthusiasm.
I knew what was going to come next. The borrowed time was lessening. Instantly, I became increasingly nervous.
"And you'll like Jacksonville so much," she jabbered while Bella stared at her vacantly. "I was a little bit worried when Phil started talking about Akron, what with the snow and everything, because you know how I hate the cold, but now Jacksonville! It's always sunny, and the humidity really isn't that bad. We found the cutest house, yellow, with white trim, and a porch just like in an old movie, and this huge oak tree, and it's just a few minutes from the ocean, and you'll have your own bathroom --"
"Wait, Mom!" Bella interrupted. "What are you talking about? I'm not going to Florida. I live in Forks."
My heart, my cold, dead, unbeating heart...I swear, it just started beating again. She wanted to stay in a place she hated, and I knew it was because of me.
What? Maybe she doesn't understand. Ren??e smiled. "But you don't have to anymore, silly," she laughed. "Phil will be able to be around so much more now... we've talked about it a lot, and what I'm going to do is trade off on the away games, half the time with you, half the time with him."
"Mom." Bella hesitated for a second. Automatically I tried to hear her mind, the space between us silent as ever before she spoke. "I want to live in Forks. I'm already settled in at school, and I have a couple of girlfriends" -- suddenly I was in Ren??e's vision. It's because of him, I know it. -- "and Charlie needs me. He's just all alone up there, and he can't cook at all."
I wasn't sure why, but it was clear that she didn't want to go to Florida with Ren??e, and I was all for that plan. Even though it wasn't a good plan.
Forks...Ren??e's thoughts were babbling inarticulately. "You want to stay in Forks?" She spluttered.
Again, I was in her vision, my face tense with the conversation. This boy...Does she love him, too? Still...Forks. Insane.
