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“Yes she pays her part of the rent. If anything, I’m the one that needs her to cover me sometimes and she does it without complaining. If it weren't for her, we would have been evicted by now. And you know what? She’s never thrown it in my face.”
“Where is she getting this money from? It’s not like she’s done any real work in her entire life.”
“Can you stop judging her?” I asked. “You don’t know her like I do. She’s my friend, not yours. I find funny is that she actually likes you.”
“Why is that so funny?”
“Because you don’t like her. You’ve never liked her.”
“That’s because I don’t like her conniving ways. You deserve better.”
I saw our conversation wasn’t going to come to a sensible resolution so I changed the subject, “Did your nurse come by today?”
“No, she’ll be over tomorrow. But Penelope came by today and she did some shopping for me.”
“Aww, I’m sad I missed her. I wish that I could see her more.”
“You two are some big babies. She said the same thing.” my mom laughed.
“Well, I can’t help it if I love my big sis. Maybe I’ll get to baby sit Bianca in the next couple of week. I miss my baby.”
“She misses you, too. She kept asking to see her Te-Te. She went looking all around this apartment looking for you. I guess she thought that you were playing hide and seek.”
“Awww. I gotta stop by their house this week and see them.”
I had a great family. Our
circumstances weren’t ideal but I was blessed to have them.
“Baby…” my mom said.
“What’s up?”
“Do you need some money?”
“Why would you ask me that?”
“My check came today and I can give you some money.”
“No mom. You keep your money and I will figure it out.”
“You don’t have to be ashamed. I know how hard you’re working. You deserve to have some extra money in your pocket. I don’t have many bills, so go get my purse and take $100.”
I shook my head quickly, “I’m not taking your money, mom. You need your money. I work so that I won’t have to ask you for anything. Let me take care of myself.”
My mom shook her head, “I swear, you’re so damned stubborn. You need to learn how to let people take care of you. You’re only twenty-one, you need help. I love that you’re independent and everything but you should have a better life than this.” My chest ached as I saw my mom tear up. She felt so guilty about not being able to take better care of my sister and me.
“Mom, just stop it. You are an amazing mother, so just stop it. I’m self-sufficient; you’ve done your part.”
“If you need anything, just let me know. I will do my best to make it happen for you.”
“I will mom.”
We both knew that I wouldn’t to ask her for anything. I never do. Her disability check wasn’t a lot and she couldn’t afford to share with me. I would go without necessities before I asked her for anything. She didn’t need a begging daughter. She needed to focus on her health so that she could get better and get the hell out of that place. My mom was vibrant and I couldn’t wait until she recovered.
Her words still got to me. I thought more and more about that sugar baby website and I wondered if I should give it another chance. That would be a great way to supplement my income. I just needed to state my ground rules, stick to my convictions and get some cash. If the men stepped out of line, I would just splash more drinks and leave. Maybe Jessica was on to something. I was tired of struggling.
#Chapter6
