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“Oh, don’t be, I have been enjoying this glorious day, and I love the woods,” she responded happily.
“And I have been thinking about nothing else,” he answered.
“Nothing else?”
“But this,” he said, taking her into his arms.
His kiss was a feathered touch of his lips on hers. She trembled in his arms and realized she wanted more, so much more from this one man.
As though reading her mind and her body language, he brought her in hard against his rock-solid chest, and his kiss was no longer quite as gentle as he parted her lips with his own.
She felt his tongue sweetly explore as it entered her mouth, and shivers of desire scattered all reason. Again, she thought of Warren and the fact that his kisses had never done this to her.
Serena knew that his lordship had awakened something in her, something that had been brewing just beneath the surface. She had been dissatisfied with need and discovered that this man satisfied that need.
His tongue met with hers and guided it into motion. She tasted the velvet smoothness of it against her tongue with some trepidation at first, unsure how to reciprocate, until she finally just let go and gave herself over to tasting him. It was as though he knew she had never done this before, and he expertly showed her the way.
He started to pull away from her as he made an inarticulate sound, but then, as though thinking better of it, he crushed her back against himself, and she thought she might not be able to breathe as two kisses became three and four.
“Serena …” he said, putting his head back. “You want me as much as I want you … say it.”
She didn’t know why, but she balked. She wasn’t sure of herself, of him, of anything, but his words were not the words she longed to hear from him, and she stared at him and said, “No. I shan’t say it. You shouldn’t ask me to.”
He chuckled. “Obstinate woman,” he answered, and then his mouth was on hers again. He broke away and nibbled down her neck, opened her Spencer, and his touch, the way he cupped her breast even over her day gown, made her heart react with a drumbeat of fevered desire. She felt her thighs clench beneath her gown. She was aware that her body jerked with passion. She made no effort to stop his audacious lovemaking. She didn’t want to stop him. She knew this was all wrong. She did not try and fool herself into thinking this was a ‘forever’ thing and that they would continue and that he would … no, she would be smarter than that, and expect nothing more than the moment. She knew that he probably didn’t love her, but she wanted this time with him, even if he walked out of her life tomorrow. She would have this. She would have the now and the memory of this glorious day.
“Say it now,” he demanded huskily. “Tell me you want me as I want you. Tell me you want no other.”
“No,” she answered. “I don’t believe in doing things on demand.”
He looked down at her and frowned. “Do you give away your kisses and the free use of your body so readily then? Shall I expect to turn a corner and find you in … let’s say, in Freddy’s arms?”
She pulled up straight. Those words slapped her hard, and she glared at him. “Think what you will. Now, kindly take me home.”
He had hurt her. What had gone wrong? Had his kisses been for one reason alone—to wean her away from Freddy? Was that his game? Oh, but it hurt.
How could he have feigned such desire? He couldn’t. Instinct told her that whatever his reasons, his kisses had been real. He did want her. He did like her. She had seen it in his eyes, on his face. Hurtful words, however, had the power to obliterate logic, and for a moment she was too hurt to think about anything but his words.
How could he have asked such a thing of her? His accusation had been unfair, and it had stabbed her to the quick.
Another thing was clear, all too heartbreakingly clear. She was in love with him. She had kissed him and allowed him liberties because of how she felt about him, because she had undeniably been caught in the moment and the passion that had sizzled between them. Perhaps, she admitted to herself, she had even hoped her feelings for him were reciprocated?
* * *
They continued down the dirt path, and Serena was surprised that the curricle was able to make it to the road that took them to the Moorely drive.
It was, however, torture sitting in silence with him. Serena hadn’t been able to even glance his way and held herself erect, her lips tight, her thoughts buzzing furiously in her mind. Life had suddenly become so completely complicated.
Why had she allowed him to kiss her like that … touch her the way he did …?
A man could kiss a woman and make delicious love to her, as Daniel had just done only a short while ago, and still be able to easily walk away. His lordship probably didn’t feel anything for her but a mild physical attraction. He would leave soon—return to his home and forget her.
Could she now forget him?
No. Even though he had insulted her and made her furious with him, she knew she wanted him still. What was she to do? She could not deny that she was three and twenty and had spurned all suitors because she had been waiting to feel what she felt right now. What, just what, should she do? Could she somehow win this man? How? She only knew how to be herself. She had never actively sought to win a man; even when she had been infatuated with Warren, she had never made a push to have him.
This was so very different. His lordship was so very different.
She watched him as he waited for the Moorely livery boy to hold his horse steady before he put down the driving reins, jumped from the leased open-air curricle, and put out a hand to help her take the short steps.
