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The ironic part was her demands were not verbal, but more behavioral. She never once asked any more of me that I was willing to offer. That was unusual for a woman, even one much older than her. So, to say Fiona occupied a special place in my mind was an understatement.
Yet somehow, I had to find a way to reconcile my need for her as a scientist in my company and also my desire for her as a man. If I were to go back to the office and see her without getting that clarity, I had little doubt that I wouldn’t be able to make a well-reasoned decision about what to do next.
Instead, I decided the best thing for me to do would be to stay behind and take a long overdue, and sorely needed, vacation. If Fiona was the scientist I believed her to be, I had every confidence she would find a way to overcome the problems with the Link Protocol and get the job done.
In the meantime, as much as I would have liked to be involved, I sensed this was a perfect opportunity for her to succeed or fail on her own merits.
In some ways, perhaps I’d trained her to be too reliant upon me. By removing the temptation altogether and unplugging myself from the situation, I reasoned Fiona would either rise to the occasion, or I’d get confirmation once and for all that it was beyond her capacity to handle.
Otherwise, if there was an emergency while I took time off, I’d left specific instructions with resort management about where to find me. And so, that afternoon, I gathered up a minimum of supplies and prepared to leave for a remote part of the island.
However, before I did, I exchanged a series of text messages with Fiona, explaining to her exactly what I’d be doing. I informed her I’d managed to buy us a bit of goodwill with the investors and that she’d need to wrap the work as quickly as possible.
I wanted to leave no doubt in her mind she was responsible for what would happen next. The time to rise to the occasion had arrived. One way or another, Fiona had to understand the seriousness of the situation.
FIONA
I was lucky.
My grandmother hadn’t seen my fainting spell at the foot of her hospital bed. But, all of the stress that caused it still swirled around me every single day.
I’d received a number of text messages and emails from Gabe in the past couple of days. It sounded as if he was able to put off the investors and delay the presentation long enough for us to get the problems fixed with the Link Protocol.
As I read his messages to me, I didn’t think much of them in the moment. This was primarily due to the fact my attention had been focused elsewhere, specifically on making progress with what I’d come back to do.
But after work one night, I came home to my apartment, and after fixing myself a bit of dinner, I took a seat in the recliner in my grandmother’s bedroom.
I still hadn’t gotten used to not seeing her there across from me, and the reality was I probably never would again. But, in any case, as I picked at my meal, I thumbed through my texts with Gabe over the past day or two.
One thing that struck me, yet again, was the curtness of his messages. Not once did Gabe ask how I was feeling or how I was doing. Of course, he didn’t know about my grandmother and her illness, but it wasn’t as if I’d left St. Barth’s in the healthiest state of mind.
He seemed completely unconcerned about it.
To make matters worse, Gabe gave me an unreasonably short deadline of only a few days to come up with a fix. That was especially the case considering the fact I was the only person who could solve the problem. There wasn't much the team could do to help with this specific issue.
In fact, over the course of the past several communications I had with him, Gabe's tone had taken a decidedly darker edge. I'd been concerned about the very real possibility I could lose my job, but until the past day or so, it was mostly my own insecurity creating the fear in my mind. However, his latest text messages did little to remove that worry and to the contrary, made it far worse.
I tossed my cell phone on top of the side table next to me, and the plastic casing protecting it broke loose. It rattled across the table, falling onto the floor with an annoying series of clicks and clacks.
I couldn’t believe that after he’d come here and seen how I lived, Gabe would threaten me in the way he had. Not only that, but what I shared with him—what I told him about my family—no one else outside of my grandmother knew about it.
Unable to eat, I set my plate down on the table next to me. I dropped it about an inch or so above the surface, and it impacted with a thud. Biting my lip, I propped my elbow up on the arm of the chair, drawing my hand to my mouth. I struggled against my urge, reminding myself I wasn’t going to cry anymore over Gabe’s arbitrary whims.
As I sat there, once again the memory of what I’d confessed to him on the veranda outside of the suite came back to me. I’d trusted him with the most precious secret I had. Not only that, but I more or less told him how important he was to me when I thought I’d lost him over the side of the boat.
