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'How the mirror can lie.' She pulled a face at herself and then turned away. But, as long as she gave Keith the impres¬sion all was well, nothing else mattered. She was going to finish this on her terms, exit his life with a bang and not a whimper. She owed herself that.
She arrived at Bailey's dead on twelve o'clock and Keith was already sitting at a table for two in what had once been their favourite spot. A young couple had entered the coffee bar in front of her and he didn't see her immediately, giving her time to study him. As she walked towards him she thought, he's not nearly as handsome as I remember him. Why didn't I see how weak his mouth looks before? How weak and almost pretty his whole face is? He's as unlike Travis as it's possible to be. A tinsel and glitter man, nothing more.
And then he saw her, his mouth breaking into the easy smile which had captured her heart in the old days but now did absolutely nothing for her. Nothing.
'Beth.' He had risen to his feet with the good manners she had once thought were natural but now knew were all part of the cultivated charm. 'You look wonderful,' he said smoothly.
'Thank you.' She smiled, avoiding physical contact by sliding into her seat at once. She didn't return the compliment.
'I don't need to ask you how you are,' he continued when he'd sat down himself, and now there was definitely an element of pique that he couldn't quite hide in his manner. She saw him glance at her left hand and it prepared her for his next question. .Axe you with anyone?' he asked in the faintly wistful tone he'd used in the past which had never failed to melt her.
'Yes, I am.' Well, she should be, she told herself, and even if Travis hadn't existed she would have said the same at this moment. 'And you? How are Anna and the children?'
He stared at her as though he couldn't quite believe it was her. But then she didn't feel like the Beth he had known any more, she realised with a great surge of joy. She had moved on. She had really moved on from all of this sordid mess.
It was a moment or two before he pulled himself together enough to say, 'Anna doesn't live in England any more. She met someone—I understand she's married now. They live in the States. Michigan, I think. Somewhere like that.'
'And the children?' Beth asked quietly.
'With their mother.' His mouth had thinned and for a second she almost felt sorry for him. Almost. Travis had been right, Keith would end up a lonely old man.
It was on the tip of her tongue to say she was glad for Anna because she genuinely was, but it might look as if she was crowing. Instead she took a sip of the coffee he had ordered in her absence, along with a slice of chocolate cake and then asked him about his work.
She kept the conversation on general lines throughout the few minutes it took to finish the coffee. The slice of cake she left untouched. And then she stood up, reaching across and holding out her hand as she said, 'Goodbye, Keith. I'm moving away so there will be no chance we'll meet again. I hope you find what you're looking for.'
He was so taken aback he didn't move for some seconds, then he mumbled, 'You're not going already? I thought... I mean, why did you call me?'
Beth smiled. 'To close the old chapter of my life so I can enter the new one with all my heart. You know me, it's all or nothing. I can't function any other way.'
He took her hand, his handshake limp. It fitted somehow. 'Who.. who is he?' he muttered resentfully.
'No one you know.' Her smiled widened. 'Goodbye.'
And she walked out of the coffee bar into the bright sunlight, the crushing weight which had been on her shoul¬ders for the last eighteen months gone. It was heady, euphoric, and she knew she was grinning like the Cheshire cat because of the strange looks passers-by were giving her, although one or two smiled tentatively back in return. Bless 'em.
She had been stupid, so stupid, she thought as she walked on, but she had never really cut the last ties which had held her to Keith. Maybe not letting go completely had all been mixed up with her parents dying and the fact that she had really meant every one of her wedding vows, but she couldn't allow a weak, immoral and flawed man to ruin the rest of her life. Travis was the antithesis of Keith in every way and she had to trust in that or she'd be hung up on her past for ever.
A clever, conscienceless liar would always have a certain amount of power over good honest people—was it Travis who had said that? But such power wouldn't and couldn't last because eventually lies were exposed. Keith didn't stand up to the light of day—literally, she thought—because she had noticed the lines appearing round his eyes and mouth and his jaws were beginning to hang. Soon those boyish good looks which were a large part of his charm would be gone, and his shallowness would become more and more apparent.
