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'No, you're not listening to me,' Catherine counter¬attacked. 'And, as we've both agreed you're a headcase and I’m not, I think you should. Apart from the fact I'm your big sister, I'm a very logical and sane person. Frankly, what have you got to lose, Neddy? At least promise me you'll think about going to see him. If you think about it you'll see it makes sense.'
Beth opened the front door. 'OK,' she said flatly. 'I'll think about it. But it doesn't make sense and I won't go.'
She thought about it all the way home through the night¬mare of London traffic and, once she'd collected Harvey, during their walk in Hyde Park. She thought about it all evening at the flat, trying to ignore how alien the place felt and how restless Harvey was. She was still thinking about it the next morning after a sleepless night.
She wasn't conscious that she had come to a decision until she found herself dialling Keith's work number. It was a direct line and he answered almost immediately. 'Keith Wright.'
For a second Beth almost dropped the phone. A huge flood of feeling swept through her but she breathed deeply, her voice remarkably steady as she said, 'Hello, Keith. It's Beth.'
'Beth?' The blank astonishment in his voice was clear. And then, after a pause, he said, 'Beth, how wonderful to hear from you,' and now he had switched to the tone he'd always used with her—warm, soft, charming. 'How are you?'
'Fine.' Another deep breath and she was able to say, 'I wondered if you fancied meeting for a coffee at lunchtime.'
'Absolutely. That'd be great.'
There had been no hesitation but then there wouldn't be, would there? Beth thought cynically. An ex-wife added to his ongoing list of conquests would be a feather in his cap as far as he was concerned. She wondered if he would ask why she wanted to see him after all this time. He didn't.
'How about Bailey's?' he suggested smoothly. 'You used tolove their chocolate cake, remember? In the old days?'
It seemed a lifetime away since she had used to meet him in their lunch hours at Bailey's, a smart little coffee bar that served wonderful sandwiches and desserts as well as every coffee under the sun. 'OK.' She glanced at her watch. 'Twelve o'clock suit you?' It had been their custom to take an early lunch to be sure of getting a table; Bailey's filled to overflow¬ing around one o'clock.
'Twelve would be great, Beth. I'll look forward to it.'
'See you then.' Beth put down the phone before he could continue the conversation and sat staring into space for a few moments. How did she feel? After the brief shock of hearing his voice, remarkably composed, but of course it would be dif¬ferent facing her ex-husband in the flesh.
She sat musing for some time, trying to work out exactly what she wanted from their meeting. She wasn't sure, Catherine had talked about laying ghosts and maybe she was right, but would it be counter-productive to see Keith after all these months? He had made her feel like the biggest fool in the world, the humiliation and pain easier to deal with than feeling she was a complete failure as a woman and a wife. She hadn't been enough for him and, despite the fact she knew Anna and all the others were in the same boat, it hadn't helped. Was she setting herself up for a gigantic fall in meeting him?
She wandered into the bedroom, opening her wardrobe and staring at her clothes without really seeing them. Travis had told her to get some backbone and come out of the pro¬tective bubble she'd been existing in. She was seeing Keith today because in her heart of hearts she knew the only way to go forward was to put the past behind her, and she couldn't do that without this one last meeting. She didn't know what it would produce, but it had to be done. End of story.
After taking Harvey for a quick walk to a small park nearby—for which he showed his disgust by refusing to look at her once they were home—she tried to make up for the change in his surroundings by giving him a big bowlful of chicken mixed with his dog meal for breakfast. He ate the food but continued with the sulk and Beth left him to it. She had more important things to focus on.
By eleven o'clock, when she inspected herself in the mirror, she was satisfied with what she saw. The pretty Empire-line dress in a vibrant bold print brought out the golden quality of her tan and made her glow with health. She had left her hair loose, its natural highlights emphasising the silky blondeness and making her blue eyes larger. She'd used the barest minimum of make-up, partly because she didn't want Keith to think she was trying too hard but also because the weeks of tramping the Shropshire countryside under a hot English sun had given her skin a colour no amount of cosmet¬ics could improve. To her great surprise, especially consider¬ing how she felt inside, she looked like a confident, proud and beautiful young woman with the world at her feet.
