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Yes, he would be shocked. Overwhelmed. As I was shocked and overwhelmed.
Maybe between us we could figure this out. Make some kind of plan. He was good at those. And he had a kid already. The role of father didn’t sit easy on his shoulders yet, but perhaps it was kind of like having cats. Having two was barely more work than having one.
God, we were so fucked.
“Hannah? What is it?” He glanced at the baby monitor again. No more crackling, but there were definite whimpers emanating from the speaker. They seemed soft, the humming water nearly drowning them out.
Too bad it couldn’t disguise the thud of my heartbeat in my ears. It was like a ticking time bomb.
“We should see to Lily.” I was already rising to grab one of the fresh towels on the bar.
“Wait.” He touched my thigh, reddened now from the steamy water. “You’re sure we’re okay? That what happened here was okay?”
The only way I could hold back the tears was by turning my head to the side. “Everything we did here was perfect. I’m just sorry that you—” I forced myself to look at him, blinking so fast he probably thought I had an eyelash stuck in my eye. “That you didn’t get to finish.”
“Hopefully, we aren’t through here?” He glanced at the monitor as Lily’s whimpers turned into full-blown tears. He dropped back his head and drew in a long breath. “Get back in the tub. Let me handle this.”
I was already wrapping the towel around me. It wasn’t even just to escape. I felt pulled to that baby, just as I had from the first time I’d seen her.
“Hannah.” He motioned for me to pass him a towel, then climbed out and quickly dried himself off. His erection tented the cotton, but he ignored it as if it didn’t exist. “I’ll be right back. Relax. Seriously. She probably just had a scary dream and she’ll be back to sleep in no time.”
From the sounds coming from the monitor, that wasn’t the case. But I humored him by nodding and shedding my towel. His jaw locked again before he left the room.
I slipped back into the hot tub. There was no orgasmic sigh as I sank into the water this time. I just buried my head in my hands.
&n
bsp; He didn’t come back right away. No, he stayed in the other room, singing to Lily
Singing to her, for God’s sake. And his voice was terrible, which somehow only made it sweeter and more poignant.
Tears rolled unchecked down my cheeks. There was no stopping them. Hormones be damned.
Everything I’d bottled up for months came rushing out, because a man I barely knew was singing to a baby I’d just met and was already growing to love.
I didn’t know how long I sat there. The hot tub bubbled endlessly. Eventually, the singing stopped. I leaned against the back of the Jacuzzi, wondering how I’d missed the little built-in headrest. Leaning against it and closing my eyes was a no-brainer.
I was worn out. Raw in every possible way. Maybe I’d just take a quick catnap.
Footsteps sounded nearby. I tried to raise my head, but it was as heavy as a boulder. Instead, I let myself be lifted, lulled by the strong arms holding me close.
All I’d ever wanted was someone to hold me.
“So tired,” I mumbled.
“Shh. I know, baby.”
His voice rumbled through me, soothing me without effort. I didn’t move when he laid me on the bed. I had my arms around his neck, but I didn’t want to let go. His laughter felt like forgiveness.
He didn’t leave me. His body curled tight to mine, a protector in the night.
I slept.
It was still dark when I opened my eyes and startled in the unfamiliar place. I threw back the covers, momentarily confused by the heavy arm across my midsection. Then it all came back to me and my face flooded with warmth.
I glanced over my shoulder and swallowed deeply at the sight of Asher’s face cast in moonlight. He was stupidly beautiful for a man. His features were rugged, yet his eyelashes were long and his mouth was soft in sleep. Vulnerable.
As vulnerable as I felt right now.
