AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I don’t give a fuck,” Rosa replied loudly. “This bitch is too goddamn grown, Juanita. And it’s time she gets her face cracked in. Kat, you got an ass whoopin’ comin’ so you might as well come outside and get it now while it’s hot. And if I gotta stand out this bitch all motherfuckin’ night, then that’s what it is.” She grabbed the door handle and started yankin’ on it. “Bring ya ass outside, you fuckin’ disrespectful bitch. You got me confused. I ain’t ya Aunt Patrice. When I get my hands on you, you gonna wish ya ass was dead.”
“Oh, really,” I said, pullin’ my nickel-plated 9mm from behind my back. Both of their eyes popped wide open in shock.
“Oh, my God,” my moms said through clenched lips, slappin’ her hand over her mouth.
Rosa let go of the door. “You’d pull a gun out on your own fuckin’ mother? I done seen it all now,” Rosa said, flingin’ her hands up in the air. “Dios mios! I don’t fuckin’ believe this shit.”
“I sure would. So believe it. And I’ll fuckin’ use it, too. Try me. Now both of you bitches get the fuck up off my property or you’ll be leavin’ up outta here in either handcuffs or body bags, take ya pick.” Although I would never call five-oh on my own family—I don’t care how serious shit got—I hoped one of the nosey-ass neighbors would. And I really didn’t wanna put a bullet in either one of ’em, but I knew in my heart I would if they pressed me.
The porch light to the house on the left came on, then the lights to the house on the other side flicked on. My moms looked around. “Let’s go, Rosa,” she said, grabbin’ Rosa by the arm.
She snatched her arm back. “No, Nita, your child needs a beat down first.”
“I ain’t a fuckin’ child,” I snapped. “I’m a grown-ass woman. Get it right.”
“I knew this was a bad idea,” my moms said. “I told you she wasn’t gonna let us in.”
“Then maybe you shoulda came by yourself,” I said, keepin’ my aim at them.
“And would that have made any difference?” she asked, starin’ me in the eyes.
“Hell no,” I said. “’Cause I want nothin’ to do with you.” For the first time in my life, I thought I saw hurt in her eyes. But that shit didn’t matter. What about all the times she hurt me? Fuck her! The truth is what it is. “Um, I think you betta get goin’ ’cause the cops are on their way. And since neither of you are invited here, it’s called trespassin’. Now, like I said before, get the fuck off my property.” I slammed the door in their faces.
I heard glass smash and knew Rosa punched or kicked, or threw somethin’ at, the storm door. It took e’erything in me not to run outside and jump on that bitch’s back, but I knew she’d have her razor spit out in her hand and would have me sliced from one end to the next before I knew what hit me. I already knew goin’ out there meant I’d have to straight-up blast her head off. “Crazy bitch,” I heard her yell. “The minute you step ’cross the
bridge, bitch, I’ma see ya ass. I put that on ya grandfather’s grave. Nita, I don’t know where the fuck you got her from, but that bitch takes the grand prize for crazy. Can you believe she pulled a gun on us? A fuckin’ gun! Oh, my God, wait ’til I tell everyone this shit!”
Rosa’s nutty ass screamed at the top of her lungs all the way back to my mom’s Benz. I flipped open my cell and called Chanel, watchin’ them pull off outta the livin’ room window.
“Hey, ho, what’s good?”
“You not gonna fuckin’ believe who came up over here tryna set shit off?”
“Who?” she asked, gettin’ amped.
“My fuckin’ moms and her nutty-ass sister, Rosa.”
“Unh-uh, say it ain’t so. I know you didn’t let them in, did you?”
“Hell no, I didn’t let them nuts in. I spoke to them hoes through the glass door; are you fuckin’ kiddin’? I already knew what time it was. Please. They wasn’t gettin’ up in here fuckin’ up my shit.”
“So what happened?” she asked. I took a deep breath, then broke the story down to her from beginnin’ to end. “Oh, my God, bitch, I can’t believe you pulled a gun out on ’em. That shit is crazy.”
“Well, believe it. I was gonna put some heat in that ass before they got up in here tryna serve me. Fuck that.” I paused, openin’ the front door. There was glass shattered all down between the doors. “This fuckin’ bitch done kicked the glass outta my door, retarded ho,” I said, slammin’ the door shut. “Anyway, I don’t think my moms was really tryna bring it, but Rosa’s ass was ready to serve it for real, for real. You shoulda seen her ass foamin’ at the mouth ’n shit, lookin’ like Cujo. I was too through with them bitches, comin’ here tryna fuck up my high.”
She started laughin’. “Kat, ya crazy ass is going straight to hell. You do know that, right?”
“Well, there’ll be a bunch of us down there then, ’cause I ain’t the fuckin’ one. I mean, on some real shit, I really didn’t wanna haveta shoot my moms, or Rosa. But if push came to shove, they’d both get bodied. And I make no apologies for that. I was here mindin’ my own fuckin’ business. Them bitches came here—uninvited, mind you—tryna disrupt my groove. And my moms already knows Rosa’s MO. She wanted to see that bitch bring it to me since her ass is still all broke up ’n shit. So, they both woulda caught a bullet.”
“Humph. That shit is crazy, for real.”
“Girl, trust, this shit was way over the top for even me. I mean, really. What the fuck made them think I was gonna let ’em up in here with open arms?”
“Your guess is as good as mine,” she said, snappin’ her fingas. “Oh, shit, girl, you not gonna believe this. Guess whose dumb ass done got arrested for stealin’ prescription pads from her job?”
“I bet it was Tameka’s porch-monkey ass,” I said.
“Yep,” she said, laughin’. “They came and snatched that ass up the other day. Now she’s sittin’ on Rikers, stressin’ the fuck out ’cause ain’t nobody tryna bail her ass out.”
