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“It’s because they taught me the meaning of loyalty. Perseverance. So maybe I’m the opposite of you.” He lifts his chin toward the glass-walled office building behind me. “Maybe I should sign a contract. Hide overseas for a while. Let my family forget about me and move on. But where does that leave me? Other than alone?”
So fucking alone. “Are you offering me a job or what? I can’t tell what your point is.”
“My point is that you might find more answers when you quit running scared. But you’re a grown-ass man, and if you decide to keep hurting the people who are brave enough to get close to you so you can feel better about your decision to shun them, then I guess that’s on you.”
I open my mouth to tell him to fuck off, but he spins on a heel and walks back to his car. He gets into his nondescript black sedan and drives away.
And I’m alone, just like he said.
With a growl, I stare at the building. My reflection in the glass doors looks nothing like the me from a few months ago. Instead of a Hawaiian shirt, I’m wearing a black T-shirt. In the place of my shorts, I have dark-wash jeans. My boots haven’t been worn in years, but I’m wearing them now. My hair is combed off my face, and I’ve contemplated getting it trimmed before I depart.
No, it’s fine. I don’t need to delay any longer.
Gritting my teeth, I sweep through the doors and charge toward the front desk. “Cannon Lannister, here to talk to Mason O’Donnell with Locke Mead.”
The middle-aged receptionist gives me a polite smile and points toward the wall of elevators. “Go on up.”
I power to the elevators as if the speed and extra force I’m putting into each step will keep me from thinking about what Kase said.
How is Penni feeling? Does she understand? Did I really plan to tell Kase and Jacobi what I did, or was I going to leave them in the dark and never talk to them again?
Would that have been easier for them or for me?
Dammit. I shove a hand through my hair, knocking it out of the neat style I perfected before I left my place.
Do I always leave before I can get close to anyone?
I haven’t talked to my mom since I left for New York. When I heard about what she did, I left town. I don’t care to talk to her, but should I have told her how much I hate her for what she did? I didn’t go to Karina’s funeral. I haven’t visited her grave. She was my best friend. I felt like she abandoned me all those years ago, but then I turned around and did the same thing to everyone who dares to care about me.
I can’t keep going like this. I don’t want to.
I walk back to the receptionist. “Can you tell Mr. O’Donnell I need to cancel and I won’t be rescheduling?”
I walk out the door and get into my vehicle. But I don’t go to Penni. I have somewhere else to go first.
