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"He was so bendy."
I squirm. “Dammit, now I'm all..."
Rose snickers. ”Thirsty?"
"Yes."
She elbows me. “Don't let your new pack know you're still fantasizing about an old lover."
"I'm more interested in how they respond to Trix if she agrees to come."
Both Enzo and Grey had been weird about her.
"Oh, that's right. You said Grey got all growly about her."
"I didn't say growly. I said he was a prick."
Rose rolls over onto her side and props her head up on her hand. “Are you really telling me you didn't find it the slightest bit hot? In your omega bits, not your brain. You can find things hot that at the same time you recognize are toxic."
I groan. “Fine, it was a little hot, I guess. But I try to suppress that shit."
"Sure. But it can make for some fun play."
"I look forward to seeing how that works out with you and Trix.”
She hums. "Me too."
I open the messaging app on my phone. “I’m inviting her. Worse case, you make a new friend. Best case, you fall madly in love."
Rose grins. “If we do, we're following you wherever you go."
"Deal." I sigh. "I don't understand why I'm not hearing back from anyone. Even if it's to tell me to fuck off, they can't help."
"I don't know. Do you think they... well, used you? While you were helping further their agenda, they were great, but now that you're persona non grata, they're nowhere to be found? It's..." Rose trails off with a pained expression.
"Fucking infuriating."
She nods. “I was going to go with hurtful and rude, but yeah, yours works better."
I press the heel of my palm into my forehead, trying to rub away the headache forming. “I don't want to believe they've been using me, but the evidence does seem to be looking that way. I've never asked them for shit."
"Maybe they've got their own fallout they're dealing with after that mess of a rally."
"Maybe. I hope that's all it is."
Even so, I don't regret the work I did for them. What they're working for is too important and really, the greater good matters more than just me. I'm just one person. One person who does actually have an option outside of running. One that isn't even that terrible.
For me. For the pack, I’m not so sure.
I can’t see what they get out of it, and don't want to be resented later. I also have no desire to be a charity case, someone they take in out of pity.
"There's always the cabin in the woods. You and Trix can come bring me supplies every month or something while I just spend my days reading and writing and gardening."
Rose shoots me a look. “Part of you wants that option, don't you?"
I snicker. “Yeah, a little bit. Though as lovely as it sounds, I think I'd get lonely and bored after a couple months."
"Well, let's keep the town of books in Europe as Plan A, huh?"
