AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Monday morning, ten minutes before I needed to leave for school, I walked past Nellie’s room, hearing Jamie’s voice coming from within. “Syphilis,” he said.
“Syphilis,” came Nellie’s reply. “S-Y-P-H-I-L-I-S. Syphilis.”
Immediately, I poked my head inside and saw Jamie sitting on one of her floor pillows, flash cards in hand. Nellie sat on her bed, staring at her ceiling. They were both dressed for the day, waiting for Mom to get ready to take them to school.
I frowned. “Uh, what kind of cards are those?”
“I took big words from a book Dad has in his office,” Nellie told me, and snatched the cards from Jamie. “Will you quiz me on one, Destelle?”
“Just one, okay? I have to head out.” I readjusted my collar as I took the card.
Nellie’s handwriting was scrawled across it, striking me as a bad way to practice. If she’d already written them down, she might’ve remembered the act of writing the letters. Wouldn’t that be cheating?
I cleared my voice, trying to sound as professional as possible. “Exuberance.”
“Exuberance,” she began. “E-X-U-B-E-R-A-N-C-E. Exuberance.”
Ding. “You should be a dictionary when you grow up,” I told her, tossing the card back. Her brown eyes looked at me excitedly, determining that my words had been a compliment.
“Destelle, your skirt is wrinkled.” Mom sighed when I came down the stairs, posted at the doorway with my keys dangling from her fingertips.
“Only a little.” I made sure my voice held the air of respect. “I put it on the hanger too late, but I think it will be okay.”
“The wrinkles should fall out throughout the day,” Dad said to Mom as he walked into the foyer, thankfully taking my side. It wasn’t often, and usually not about important things. “Are you still going to stay after school for tutoring today?” he asked me.
Mom, though, answered. “She is. I told Mrs. Flannery—the freshman science teacher—she’d be down within ten minutes of the last period.”
Once again, no question of whether Iwantedto do it. No choice.
But why was I surprised? Life had always been that way. With college, with my clothes, with my spare time. I’d always handed my parents control of those things without blinking—when had I started wanting things differently?
Since Stella,I thought, picturing my shoebox of secrets.
“What you’re doing is good, Destelle,” Dad said, as if he picked up on my rogue thoughts. “It’ll look great for your scholarships and college applications.”
“We’ve already turned those in,” Mom informed him lightly. “And she’s going to have the most impressive résumé. The colleges we’ve picked won’t even dream of saying no.”
The collegeswepicked. The words settled bitterly on my chest. It wasn’t like I didn’twantto go to college. I just wanted to experience things first. And it wasn’t like I wanted to travel theworld—though that would’ve been a whole new level of epic. So many kids attended online colleges. Why wasn’t I allowed to?
I’m not a boat rocker, I told myself, even though my talk with Margot trickled in. Sure, I knew how to swim, but I also knew when to avoid shark-infested waters. The idea of rocking the boat with Mom and Dad circling still terrified me beyond belief.
I was just so afraid of disappointing them. Even though I wanted to continue my education online, it wasn’t something my parents wanted, and undermining them sounded insane. I couldn’t comprehend it. It felt like breaking some sort of law.
Did that make me a good little soldier, perfectly molded into the person they wanted me to be?
All the talk with Harry last night about going on an adventure over summer was just talk. I could see that now. I could hope and dream all I wanted, but I knew who I was deep down. Destelle was not a girl who would go against what her parents said. At least not to that extreme.
But canceling my Thursday plans… I could break the rules once. Just once.
“This is Destelle Brighton,” I said in a nasally voice Thursday afternoon, pinching my fingers tighter over my nose. Blood pounded in my ears, and I prayed my anxiety wasn’t obvious.Breathe.“I’m not going to be able to come tonight and volunteer. I’m not feeling well.”
“Oh, sweetie, that’s okay,” the nurse over the phone said immediately, sympathy sounding overly saccharine. “Probably best to stay away.”
My guilt ebbed a bit at that statement, and I peered out the windshield. The outside of Crushed Beanz looked so different in the daylight, the teal awning and cursive letters looking rather commonplace instead of the alluring scrawl it looked like at night.
“Our seniors will miss you, though,” the nurse went on. “Do you want me to put you down for another day next week?”
“I’ll have to check my schedule and call back, if that’s okay.” A wave of nausea went through me at the idea of letting down the senior citizens. Were they really going to miss me, or was the nurse trying to play the guilt card? Did she know I was lying?Breathe.“H-Have a good night.”
