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KWAN
After finishing the set at Level, we’d filed from the stage, smiling and waving as we went. Kasem was his usual self, flirting and blowing kisses at his adoring crowd, but this time, I heard my name shouted a couple of times too, and I couldn’t wait to see what he had to say about that.
There was a buzz tonight. We’d done well, the earlier rehearsals paying off, but my wrist was starting to throb. No need to hold a microphone, though. We wore headsets with small microphones attached so that had been a blessing.
We hustled into the small dressing room, laughter filling it as we sat down on the sofas and chairs. I went to sit next to Cho but was unceremoniously bumped out of the way by Kasem. Guess he really hadn’t liked my performance tonight.
“Well done tonight, boys. It was a great show, much better than the atrocity last night.” Saul’s voice rose about the noise, and we quieted down. He was our manager, and his opinion mattered to me even though he was drunk half the time.
“Last gig tomorrow and then we’ll be travelling back to Manchester. We have nothing for a week or so, but I do want you rehearsing during that time. These new routines and songs need to be polished.”
He staggered and almost fell but managed to sit on one of the easy chairs closest to him. He was breathing heavily, a deep flush to his face, but he sipped his usual whiskey and seemed to recover himself.
“I was going to save this”—he stopped for a moment, mopping his brow—“but I think I might have a gig for you that could be the breakthrough you wanted. I’m not telling you what or where just yet. I’m waiting for the final confirmation, but this could be what we’ve been waiting for.”
At his words, Kasem and Li jumped up, hugging each other and laughing.
It was what we’d been working for these past eighteen months, and finally, things looked as if they were looking up.
Cho looked over at me, a beaming smile on his face.
“Fuck, yeah,” he mouthed, nodding, and I nodded back, a grin on my face. This could be it. I’d have to call my sister, Hana, and tell her the good news. But it could wait until tomorrow. We were all tired again, and I was ready for my bed.
“Same again tomorrow then, boys. Up early for breakfast, rehearsals, a rest in the afternoon, then on to the club for the last gig. We travel back the following morning on the 6 a.m. train.”
We all stood, and I hung back to catch up with Cho. He put his arm around my shoulders, giving them a squeeze.
“This could be what we’ve been waiting for, Kwan. No more chopping vegetables in the restaurant. We could make enough money to pay someone to do it for us.”
“I can’t believe Saul actually came through for us. I honestly thought he was just full of shit. It’s been eighteen months of blood, sweat and tears. I’ll be honest, Cho. I had been thinking of calling it quits.”
“I know you have. I’ve seen the sparkle leave your eyes and your performance, Kwan, and it’s only got worse since Kasem joined the group.”
“Yeah, I have something to tell you about that but not tonight. Maybe when we get home. I don’t need nosy people getting all up in our business.” As I said the words, Kasem turned, giving me a filthy look, that ever-present sneer on his face.
“Problem, Kasem?” Cho asked. He wasn’t afraid of confrontation, and neither was I, but after the high of the concert, I couldn’t be bothered with his histrionics tonight.
“No, just wanted to know what happened to Kwanchai’s boyfriend? I saw him in the crowd looking like he was about to go fuck another guy. Didn’t give you a second look. How do you feel about that?”
“You know what, Kasem? Why don’t you mind your own fucking business?” The dig about Beau being with someone else struck a nerve, and I shrugged off Cho’s arm and stepped towards Kasem.
“Why don’t you make me?” He was goading me, I knew this, but I’d been holding back for months now. And how old was this guy? This wasn’t high school.
I took another step, almost toe to toe with him now, looking down on him. My 5’10” towering over him.
“Leave it, Kwan. He’s spoiling for a fight.” Cho grabbed my arm, pulling me backwards before I could do anything I’d probably regret. “And Kasem, just go. It’s late, and tempers are frayed right now, especially mine. I’m sick of dealing with your shit. Go take it to Saul or Li.”
Kasem looked on in shock. I don’t think any of us had spoken to him like that before, but it showed how tired of his constant harassment we were.
He just couldn’t leave it there, though, and his continual need to have the last word won out.
“Remember what I said, Kwanchai.”
I remembered all too well, and Cho looked at me, his brow furrowed, a questioning look on his face.
“Let’s just go back to the hotel. I’m tired and need some painkillers.” Plus, I needed to get away from here. The night had soured, leaving a bad taste in my mouth. Not just what had gone down with Kasem but the whole Beau thing too.
I could message him, I supposed, but, as much as he’d caught my eye, after the news we’d had from Saul, I thought it best to leave it. A relationship was the last thing I needed if we were going to be on the road more. I didn’t say it was the last thing I wanted. I did want it. I wanted him, but after tonight, I wasn’t sure where we stood. I had my singing; he had his boyfriend.
