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She pushes past me, flipping off the lights as she grabs her purse and heads for the front door. I hurry after her.
“Emmy Lou, please. Let me apologize. Let me try to explain.”
She scoffs and my heart cracks a little more.
“I messed up, Emmy Lou. I know that. I just got scared. I’m not used to people caring for me.”
“If you get scared then you talk to people. You don’t run away,” she throws over her shoulder.
“I know. I’m sorry. I don’t have many, or any, examples of a healthy relationship. Remember when you asked me about my parents?”
She nods, pausing as she fiddles with her keys.
“Well the truth is that they were both deadbeats. They were addicts who spent all of their time and money chasing their vices. They barely even remembered that they had a kid most days.”
“I’m sorry, Spencer. I truly am. I can’t imagine what that would be like… but that doesn’t excuse how you hurt me. I can’t just forgive you after you were going to leave without even saying goodbye.”
“I know, but if you just give me a second chance, I promise that it will never happen again.”
She swallows hard and looks away from me.
“I thought you were one of the good guys,” she whispers. Her soft voice cuts deeper than yelling and screaming ever could. “You walked away from me, after I told you that I love you. You’re the only guy I’ve ever said that to. Didn’t it mean something? Didn’tImean something? And you just left without a second thought. What’s to stop you from doing it again?”
My mouth opens but I don’t know how to reassure her. Instead I follow after her out onto the sidewalk and wait as she locks the front door. I feel like even more of an ass. Not only did I break her heart, but I turned into the very thing I hate; someone who abandons and hurts the ones they love. It kills me to know I caused the same pain in her heart that I’ve always felt deep in mine.
“I love you, Emmy Lou,” I whisper and she shakes her head as she walks past me.
“I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you,” she says as she opens her car door.
“Then I’ll prove it to you,” I vow.
She stares at me for a beat before she slams the car door closed and pulls away from me.
Well, that could have gone better but there’s still a chance that I can turn this around.
I just need to show her that I’m never going to make the mistake of leaving her again.
Chapter8
Emmy Lou
Idon’t know what to think about Spencer showing up here last night after a week of nothing. Part of me had been happy to see him but then everything that happened between us hit me and all I felt was rage.
It was too little, too late.
His apology had seemed sincere but I can’t give into him. Not if he’s just going to leave me again. I barely survived it the first time. There’s no way I’d make it if he left me a second time.
I keep thinking about the family legend. That I would just find someone, take one look at him, and know that he was meant to be mine. I thought that I had found that with Spencer, but obviously, I was wrong. How can I trust my own judgment in the future?
I just need to give up my ideas of finding my Prince Charming and getting my happily ever after.
My heart aches at the thought but it’s hurt a lot more since Spencer walked away without a backward glance. I spent the last week walking around like a zombie. I barely ate anything. I wasn’t hungry and every time I tried to force myself to grab something to eat, it only reminded me of us going out to eat together.
Everything seemed to remind me of him. Driving past LuLu’s, seeing a Jeep or a plane, hell, even being in my own store.
I spent most of the time that I wasn’t at work curled up in my bed crying until I fell asleep. Harlow and Aurora both did everything that they could to be there for me and to try to cheer me up but I just wanted to be alone. I felt too raw to be around other people. That didn’t stop them from checking on me and I know that I’m lucky to have such great friends.
I spent most of my time at home. I could barely stand to be at the bookstore. Every time the door opened, I found myself wishing that it was him and I couldn’t look at the couch in the back without picturing the two of us making love there, before everything fell apart.
