AllFreeNovel
Share Us
When the truthfinally came out, it was never meant to be like this.
Part of me knew, coming back, I had to plan Alistair’s demise. How could I not? He had a hand in this as much as Beckett did, and while the latter seems to be an untruth, the former isn’t.
It’s funny, though, because when I got here, my sole focus seemed to narrow straight onto Beckett. Call it total consumption, but I did get lost to him. Alistair would always be a matter for another day, and really, killing his beloved son was a fate worse than death for Alistair. I’d take it all, chip by chip, until there was nothing left but a decimated empire and not a single bloodline for Alistair to chase.
Then I’d deal with him.
Beckett, however, was the curveball I allowed myself to get swept up in.
“He’d probably tell you this story so much differently than me. Maybe he’ll tell you how I asked for it. He’d definitely tell you how I wanted it. He’d spin this story so very differently to what I have to say.”
“I’m not listening to him, though,” he states, his voice void of all emotions. “I’m listening to you.”
“Are you, though?”
“Yes,” he bites. “I want to hear this story fromyou. Not him.”
I nod. Right. He wants to hear it from me. I knew I was going to tell him the rest anyway, but having his permission is a release I didn’t know I wanted.
“Just know, I never begged him formore, Beck, but I did beg him.”
I remember slurring my words, pleading with him to grant me mercy. That only seemed to empower Alistair like he was feeding off my fear.
“I begged him to stop.”
Beckett takes that hit like a man, but he can’t stop his eyes from fluttering shut for a moment as he digests the very idea of it.
“I begged him to stop, and I called out for you to save me.”
Some would say I’d take delight in this, but now the walls of our past are tumbling down, I can’t enjoy this. Everything we knew is falling away from us and the game’s changing all over again because of it.
“I cried out for you, but you never came. I called your namesomany times.”
“Natalia-”
Never have I heard Beckett sound this mournful. Part of me hates it. Another part wants to hear it more. Like the sound of his grief is atonement.
My name was only ever meant to leave his lips in lust or hate. Never in such a sorrowful way.
“But you never came. I called and you never came.” I inhale, trying hard to push the wave of resentment I still harbour down. “He listened, and he used that against me. He told me how you weren’t coming because this was whatyouwanted.”
Beckett frowns as his eyes lose all emotion. Something just shut off in this man, and I know the damage I’m reaping is dangerously close to ending him.
But I don’t stop.
I won’t stop.
This story needs to be told, and it needs to be told to the only audience it deserves.
“And do you know what he said to me when he shot his load?”
He winces as I say that so crudely, but this has spent so long locked inside that I don’t want to cut to pleasantries. I want this to cut everyone up as much as it did me.
“What?”
“He told me you never wanted a kid with me. So, do you know what he did to really prove that point?”
“What?”
