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She fucks me over so epically, and I don’t even have the balls to get rid of her like I need to. If my father could see me now, he’d say I’m a disappointment to our name. Nothing unlike what he’s told me before, but this time it’d probably be the truth.
Deciding I’ve wallowed in my shit long enough, I get out of the car and trudge inside. If she’s going to be withhim, I need to get her shit out ofmyhouse. Seeing the reminders of how she fooled me lying around the house will do nothing but stir up more anger.Out of sight, out of mind.
I need a detox. Right? That’s exactly what I need. Get her out, get my head on straight. I shouldn’t allow myself to be ruled by a feisty, infuriating woman who drives me mad.
I slam the door behind me, heading to the kitchen, where Reilly sits at the bar with a massive bowl of spaghetti. It’s late, but I’m not surprised he’s up eating. He has problems sleeping most of the time and he hates being alone. Clearly, that’s what he’s dealing with tonight, too.
Maybe he can sense that she’s gone.
Maybe he can sense that I let her go.
Maybe he can sense the turmoil inside me, wondering if I fucked up or did the right thing.
Maybe I’m feeling the guilt of my actions because I think I might have made a mistake.
“You look like ass.” His steel eyes take in my wild appearance. My hair sticks out every which way from how many times I’ve run my hands through it tonight, my tie hangs loosely around my neck, my shirt is untucked and wrinkled, and I’m sure my face looks like shit too.
“Thanks,” I grumble. “Where’s Rush at?”
“In his office. He’s in just as bad of a mood as you seem to be in. The same person must have pissed in both of your bowls of cereal. What happened today? I asked him, but he told me to ask you. Well, more specifically, he said, ‘Why don’t you ask that fuckface you call a best friend,’ and some other things, but you get the gist.” His head is cocked to the side, looking at me with confusion.
“I can’t fucking deal with this right now, Reilly. We can talk about it tomorrow,” I snap.
Yelling at him is just going to make him come on stronger. He’s like a dog with a bone when he’s not being told all the information.
“Where’s Tara? I thought she was with you.” I can hear the subtle nerves in his voice. He’s trying to mask it, though I know him well enough to catch it.
“Not coming back.” I know I need to tell him what went down, that Tara is a traitor, I think, but I need to talk to Rush first.
Reilly’s fork falls from his hand, clinking against the glass bowl. “What do you mean she’s not coming back?” His tone is sharp, looking at me like I just grew another head. “Where is she?”
“Just,” I let out a deep sigh, scrubbing my hand down my face, “not right now. I’m exhausted, I’m pissed, and I need a shower.”
“No. What did you do to her?” He stands from his seat, stopping in front of me. His large, fit body is corded with tension, like a viper ready to attack.
“Why do you thinkIdid something toher? How do you know she didn’t do something to me?” I defend. My best friend is automatically taking the traitor’s side. Of course, he is. He’s so far gone for her it’s ridiculous.
“Let it go, man. I don’t want to fucking fight with you right now. I’m not in the mood.” I storm away from him. Right on my heels, Reilly’s shouts fill my ears with his questions about what I did. Just as I get to Rush’s office, the door swings wide open.
Rush’s dark eyes connect with mine, and before I can utter a word, he charges at me, shoving me into the wall. His chest rises and falls rapidly; the black orbs I stare into are filled with pure murder.
“You motherfucker! You are a fucking liar. You didn’t have the Snakes protecting her. You don’t care about her. You’re disgusting!” he roars in my face, pulling me forward and slamming me back into the wall so forcefully that my head hits it with a thud. A sharp stabbing pain pounds through my skull, but I can only think about the rage radiating from Rush. He could easily beat my ass in a matter of seconds, something I’m trying to prevent as much as possible, but that doesn’t look likely.
“Rush, what the fuck, man?” Reilly is staring at him wide-eyed.
“Tell him. Tell him how you let that fucking monster get his hands on her. Tell him how you didn’t protect her and lied about having the Snakes watch over her. How you gave up on her.” Rush rears his hand back, clocking me right in the jaw. The hit sends a wave of pain crashing through my face. Rush used to be a fighter and he’s definitely kept in shape. The man knows how to throw a punch and make it count.
Still stunned, I’m trying to understand what he’s saying. “What are you talking about?” I didn’t give up on her, she is a damn traitor that chose him over me. She made me out to be the fool in this situation. Not the other way around.
“Zayan! You fucking idiot! You don’t even understand what you did! You only ever think about yourself and say fuck it to the consequences of your actions.” He pushes away, turning his back to me while he grips the back of his neck. I can see his muscles coiling again ready to snap. Before I can move out of the way, he spins around, quickly landing another punch straight to my gut, knocking the wind right out of me.
Apparently, he’s not done with me yet.
“WhatIdid? You don’t even know what she did! She’s a fucking traitor!” I yell back at him coughing as I try to suck in as much air as I can from having the wind being knocked out of me. I can’t stand here and let them think she’s the fucking angel she’s led them to believe.
“Are you kidding me? You’re a fucking dumbass. You’re so god damn stupid, arrogant, and you can’t even see what the fuck is right in front of your face until you ruin it and push it away.” Disbelief laces his voice as he yells at me. His fists clench at his side, and I know he’s gearing up to land another hit on me. This time, I’m more prepared. I’ll be ready for the next hit.
“Rush, man. Look at me.” Reilly stands between us, trying to get Rush to calm down. “Look at me,” he begs. I watch them curiously as Reilly puts his hand on Rush’s chest, then moves to his shoulder, squeezing it to get him to relax.
