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ONE
‘NOW WE’RE EVEN’ BRENNAN SAVAGE
Gio
The heart monitor beeps steadily, a rhythmic tone letting me know my best friend, Luce Rametta is alive. Still, I have to constantly remind myself that he’s only sedated, that he’ll wake up at any moment and only had minor surgery to reset his bones. Nothing major, nothing life-threatening, just a broken elbow and a few pins in his shattered wrist. He also sustained a pretty bad concussion, but the doctor says there’s no swelling -a shock, she said - but if she knew what a thick skull Luce had, it wouldn’t have surprised her.
I sigh, once more, my eyes continuously counting the patterned dots on the tiles under my feet as I rest my chin on my fists. It’s been one fuck of a day. The clock on the wall across from Luce’s bed says it’s past three in the morning now, almost twenty-one hours since my father, Alan Vaccari rammed his car into Luce and Lexi, kidnapping her and leaving my best friend to die like a dog.
My fingers squeeze tighter when I think of Lexi in his clutches once more, hidden away where no one can find her or protect her, and now it’s not just her in his sadistic hands either. Luce’s sister, the apple of his eye, was also taken. Alan has had Maxine for almost a week, using her life to keep Lexi in line, no doubt.
Fuck, my heart and mind are in so much anguish that I feel like the world can see the invisible wounds that bleed from my chest. A blessing I’ve been given, a once-in-a-lifetime love ripped away from me in mere seconds, turning smiles into frowns, laughter into tormented screams, joy into misery.
My eyes slide over to the silent TV before landing on the rain pelting the windowpane in Luce’s private room, the sky weeping the millions of tears I don’t have the patience to cry. If only I had gotten there sooner, if only I had called Luce faster, just minutes, evensecondsbefore…
“Fuck,” I whisper to myself before dropping my face into my palms as I remember everything that took place just this morning.
I became too confident, too complacent with my security, too fucking stupid in my pride.That piece of shit wouldn’t dare show his face with us around you.That was my promise to Lexi the last time I saw her, and no one can convince me that my promise to her didn’t fall flat as fuck.
I feel like I ruined her life, I should have just let her go on her own when she ran away to New York, but I couldn’t. My need for her, my greedy desire that only grew over time, led me to her the same way spring follows winter. If I hadn’t been so caught up inmywants andmyneeds, she’d still be here.
All my life, I questioned my purpose. I always felt my happiness was out of reach, and I’d only find true joy in two places: the grave or Lexi’s heart. I chose the latter and look at how well that worked out for her.
My stepmother, best friend, father’s wife…my fuckingeverything.
I shake my head, hating the truth I like to hide deep within myself, a truth I cover with pretty lies…I’m a selfish man, unparalleled to others in a way that if I were granted the ability to go back in time and redo everything differently, help Lexi get free of my father, and watch her build her own life from afar, I wouldn’t. Fucking kill me now because I wouldn’t do it, and I loathe myself because of that.
Selfish desire. Coveted love. Sinful lust. I want her, and I’m fucked up enough to admit to myself that I wouldn’t let her go…not completely.
My childhood was a place of limitation, a place of vulnerability and weakness, forcing Lexi and me to adapt to it all. Because of that, I grew to believe that the only purpose I served in this life was to give her what she tried so hard to give me in a house that practically smothered anything good. A life of joy, a life she damn well deserved. But I fucked up, and now she’s back in the hands of a monster.
I rub my eyes with the palms of my hands, telling myself the wetness I feel is merely tired eyes rather than the broken tears that sit on my lashes. I miss the smiles we had together, the feel of her arms, her lips, the sound of her laughter, her sighs… I just miss her. With my best friend laying helpless and vulnerable in this cold hospital, I miss her even more.
I’m going to find her. I’m not going to rest until I do, then I’m going to take a long, sweet, and tortuous time killing my own father because this world will never be safe for Lexi until he’s no longer breathing. When I find my woman and Maxine, I’m going to rid the world of Alan’s tainted existence.
I may not be worthy of Lexi, but once she’s safe and that bastard of a man is dead and gone, I vow here and now that Lexi will be free of me. I wouldn’t go back and change my time with her, but from this moment on, her life will be her choice whether that includes me or not.
“Gio?” Luce’s hoarse voice has my head snapping up.
I jump from my seat and rush over to him, avoiding his bad arm and putting my hand on his shoulder lightly.
“Fuck, it’s good to see you awake, man. How’re you feeling?”
He groans and tries to sit up, but his movements tug on the tubs in his arms and the air tube in his nostrils, making him lay back with a groan.
“What the fuck is all this?” He looks down at himself, the ETC monitor beeping loudly as his heart rate speeds up.
I sit on the edge of his bed, stopping him from ripping out the drip IV.
“Calmati, brother. You had minor surgery on your elbow and wrist, so don’t go ripping your stitches out like a tool.”
His brows furrow at my words, confusion shining in his dark green eyes. I can see the questions he has but not finding the words to ask, so I blow out a breath and press the morphine button on his bed before speaking again.
“What do you remember before waking up here?”
I watch as he searches his mind for the pieces of memory, but when I see it all come crashing back to him, I rest my hand on his chest to keep him calm.
“Where is she, G? Please tell me you have Lexi, that she's fine and watching those girly shows at home.” His chest heaves as he searches for the truth in my eyes.
