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She dragged her feet to the front door of the house and I knew Carter was waiting downstairs, probably the same as me, waiting for her decision. Carter thought she’d pick him, as they had history. Kane was fine with whom she picked, but then he didn’t put an argument forward. But I knew who her fated mates were and Kane was preferable to Blake. What I hoped was the Gods had send Carter and Ryan to test me, and not as new fated mates like Blake was in the last life.
I strolled to the landing to wait, and the knock came quickly as it rattled off the wooden door.
“Hi,” Carter said. “Come in.”
“Thanks,” she said.
“Why didn’t you get one of us to pick you up?” he asked.
“I’m meeting Polly for a drink in town in thirty minutes, so I wanted to get this over with.”
“Over with?” Carter’s voice raised with a surprised tone.
“Mmm, can we get everyone in the kitchen?”
“Oh, everyone,” Carter said, his voice resigned. He thought she would automatically choose him, probably because he told her he was her chosen one. I had a feeling that wouldn’t matter to Lacey, and I think I called that right. “Take a seat, I’ll get everyone down in two minutes.”
Carter dashed up the stairs two at a time. “Kitchen,” he said as he passed me and went to knock on Kane’s and Ryan’s doors.
It didn’t feel right.
Something was definitely off.
Carter didn’t see it, he didn’t feel it, but I sure as hell did. I ran down the stairs before everyone else got there. “What’s wrong?” I asked, seeing her face, and I knew I was right. I’d seen the same look before.
She smiled. It wasn’t a big smile that always lit up her face. This smile was a sorry smile, a smile that was about to break my heart. And I knew because it was one I’d seen before. I turned and raced out of the kitchen and back to my room because I couldn’t hear it, whatever it was—not yet.
The banging at my door told me that decision wasn’t happening. “Seb downstairs now,” Carter shouted. “She isn’t talking until you’re there too and she has a cab booked in twenty minutes.”
One minute later and I sauntered into the kitchen. Lacey looked at each of us, one after the other. Sighing, she stopped on Ryan.
“Ryan, I want you to be with the person you love.” She smiled, but it was weak. “I want you to be happy, and I’m happy for you.” She sighed and laughed lightly. “But as ridiculous as this sounds, I can’t share you.”
She shook her head, cursed, and mumbled something to herself at what she’d said. I waited for Ryan to tell her she was wrong, but he didn’t. He sat there, stunned, and it was as though she shouted and screamed at him, but she didn’t. Everything that came from her mouth was calm.
Too fucking calm.
“I thought we had a connection, and as crazy as this sounds… maybe it sounds selfish… I don’t want you to see anyone else. I can’t handle it,” she said as she walked around for a bit, looking the most nervous I’d ever seen.
“And it’s made me have a long think.” She paused. “It won’t work,” she rushed and paused again and sighed. “You’re asking to share me but I might fall in love with four men who will eventually break my heart when I’m not enough.”
“You’ve always been enough,” Kane said, which surprised me.
Does he remember?
“It’s already proven that I’m not enough for Ryan,” she said, and smiled lightly. “And that’ll be the same for everyone in the end.”
I wanted to inform her I was always who she was with. I was her soulmate, but I knew the moment I did that my time here could end. The Gods put that decision into place and I had to wait like the others and hopefully, I could find another way.
“So… I’m ending it with everyone. You can remain my knights, but that is it. But if you don’t want that, please let my uncle know so he can do what he needs to do,” she said. Her throat rose and fell with a gentle swallow.
I closed my eyes. I knew it was bad, not this bad, though.
“I want you all to be happy because eventually, you’ll want someone to yourselves. I know I won’t be enough, I know that now and I can’t feel this way again when you find someone you want to be with.”
“You know I want to be with you,” Carter said. I raged inside, listening to him saying that.
“Carter…”
