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“I can’t believe your mom’s back.”
“Me either.”
“It still hurts.Doesn’t it?”
I looked at him for a few seconds and realized he wasn’t asking me a question.He was telling me how he felt.
“It still hurts you, Dad.Doesn’t it?”
I repeated his words back to him, and he nodded.His eyes stilled, and he looked like he was going to cry.It was the closest I’d ever seen to him shedding a tear.
“She was the love of my life.She gave me my four beautiful sons.”
“But she left, Dad.”
“She did.I wasn’t a perfect husband.”
“And she was a shitty-ass mom.”
He pressed his lips together.“You know, one thing I’ve learned in this life, Sam, is that you shouldn’t judge anyone else.We don’t know what path she was on.”
“The path to hell.”
He chuckled slightly.“But maybe she’s back from hell.Maybe she wants a little piece of heaven.”
“Well, I don’t know that she deserves it, Dad.”
“Probably not.But I’ll tell you this, I haven’t forgotten her.I haven’t stopped wondering what I did wrong to make her leave.”
“You don’t think about the man she left you for, the new life she left you for?”
He stared at me for a few seconds and nodded.
“I do.I think about it all the time.I used to wonder if she had other kids to replace us, and that’s why she never called or came to see us.I used to wonder if she even remembered who we were.And now she’s back as if she didn’t rip all our hearts out.”
“She’s still your mom, Sam.”
“No,” I said.“She’s not.Anyway.I’m going to get myself something to eat and a drink.”
“Okay.”He nodded.You want me to come with?”
“No, I need to speak to Sergio and Santino.”
“About what?”
“They don’t know about Mom.And if you’re going to be meeting up with her, I think they need to know sooner rather than later.And it needs to come from me.”
“Thanks, son.”
“You’re welcome, Dad.”
“You know something, Sam?”
“No.”I started heading toward the front door.“There aren’t many things I know.”
“Wait,” he said as I opened the door.
“Yeah?”I turned and looked back at him.
