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“How did you know where I was?”
“Elise. I’ve been texting her since you tried to break up with me. Will gave me her number, and I reached out to her asking what was going on. She filled me in on all the details, and I organized the town car for you guys.”
She pulls back. “Wait, you got us the town car?”
“Yeah. I didn’t want you to have to worry about anything while you were dealing with your dad.”
“And then you followed me here,” she says, her contemplative gaze putting all the pieces together.
I nod, unashamed. I would do it again in a heartbeat. I’d do anything for her.
“Thank you,” she says before leaning up to kiss me.
None of the Edmonson kids ever talked about their dad growing up. I asked Will about him once, and he said he wasn’t worth the breath it would take to talk about him. So I never broached the subject again.
But things are different now. I have a lot of questions about him, and I want to be sure she’s gotten all the closure she needs so she never has to deal with him again.
“Can you tell me a little about him?”
She glances back at the door she walked out of. “I honestly don’t remember him. I only vaguely remembered what he looked like from pictures I’d seen, but I was four when he left and sometimes I think I remember things, but they’re so indistinct I can’t be sure. But I remember after. I remember all the nights my mom cried in her room or the bathroom thinking we didn’t know. I remember her working herself to the bone so she could provide for us and still somehow finding ways to support us and read us bedtime stories and be there for us. I remember the first time someone asked me when I was in kindergarten why my dad didn’t live with us. I didn’t know. I didn’t know why he’d left, but I kept thinking maybe it was my fault. Was I not good enough for him to stay? Was I not good enough for him to be my dad? He never sent birthday cards, or Christmas cards, or anything to let us know he even thought about us. It was like he just walked out the door and no longer existed. But we knew he was out there. I remember trying to be the best at whatever I tried because I thought maybe then he’d come around, he’d come watch me compete or something.”
She competed in swim team until junior year. Will never told me why she quit, but now I wonder how much of why she even started was attributed to her dad.
“I remember the first father-daughter dance. Our grandparents had already passed, and my mom hadn’t started dating Doug yet. I wanted to go so desperately, but I was the girl without a dad. Will offered to take me, but I couldn’t bear the thought of being different from everyone else. I just wanted my dad. I wanted some sign he cared. I wanted him to want me.”
Her voice doesn’t crack like I expect it to. Instead, she holds her head up tall, her shoulders back and her body carrying a strength I don’t know that I’ve ever seen in her before. She has to be the most beautiful woman in the world in this moment—hell, in every moment—but I’m admittedly biased.
“I don’t need him to want me anymore in order to feel like I’m worthy. It was never about me to begin with. All his choices are on him.” Her gaze drops to the ground briefly before looking up at me. “Just like my choices are mine.” She brushes her hand against my jaw, and I fight the urge to close my eyes because it feels so good to have her touching me. “I made the wrong choice yesterday in LA, but I promise you I won’t make that choice again. I choose you, Trent. From today on, I’ll always choose you.”
Pulling her close to me again because I simply can’t stop touching her, I whisper against her hair. “I love you, Becka Edmonson, and I promise to choose you too. Always.”
She stares at me in wonder. “Where did you come from?”
I can’t help smirking, but I don’t say anything snarky or cute like I usually would, because I know there’s more she needs to let out. Hell, a lot of what she’s said has stirred up memories of my own childhood and the feelings of abandonment and neglect I felt from my mom.
Quietly, she confesses, “I think I’ve spent most of my life expecting men to leave me because if the one man who’s supposed to love me unconditionally didn’t stay, why would anyone else?”
I can’t take it anymore. Cupping her face, I bring her lips to mine and kiss her fiercely, needing to connect with her this way, to make sure she knows she’s not alone. But the act itself isn’t enough. “I’m not leaving you.”
She looks at me, her green eyes still a little watery and her voice hoarse. “I want to believe you.”
“I’ll find a way to prove it, because I swear to you, Becka, you’re it for me. I’m never letting you go. I don’t want you to be waiting for the other shoe to drop. There’s no other shoe. I’ll have to literally leave for tours and stuff, but I’ll always belong to you. There won’t be any other women but you. For as long as I live, I’m yours.”
Something shifts in her gaze and then her mouth is on mine, kissing me with a hunger that leaves me wanting more than just her lips. But now’s not the time. Reluctantly, I break the kiss, leaning my forehead on hers as we both take deep breaths.
“I don’t want to mess this up again, Trent.”
“You won’t. Because no matter what, I’ll always be here waiting for you.”
God, this woman. She has no idea what she means to me, even after all this time. Somehow all that I’ve said and done hasn’t gotten through to her, and I’m not sure what it’ll take, but I’ll do anything to make sure she understands that there’s nothing in this world she could ever do to drive me away.
Pulling away, she says, “Let’s go to the car. I need to check on Elise.”
We walk back to the car hand in hand, and when we get to the back doors, I release her, but not before dropping a too-brief kiss on her lips. She smiles softly, her eyes crinkling at the corners, and then slides in next to her sister. They immediately start murmuring to each other, and I know she’ll spend the whole ride back to the hotel comforting Elise. I slide into the front passenger seat and let the driver know we’re good to go.
It’s still bothering me that somewhere in her head she thinks I might leave her, and the drive back gives me time to figure out how I’m going to convince Becka that I’m fully committed to her.
As we pass business after business and head closer to the strip, I see something that immediately catches my eye, and instantly I know what I need to do. The idea should terrify me. I’m sure my brother would think I’m being reckless and insane, but it feels right. It feels so right that I’m antsy to get back to the hotel and put my plan in motion.
