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I shake my head no. “I don’t think I can.”
After Maddie’s accident, I vowed to never go down a mountain again. Just the thought of it brings back all the turmoil I felt during the days that followed. If it weren’t for Crew, I’m not sure how I would have survived it. There were so many times I considered ending the pain permanently. He saved me, and in some ways, I think I saved him, too. Our grief brought us together, but it’s also our grief that tore us apart.
“You’re stronger than you think, Scar.” He reaches his gloved hand out. “Take my hand.”
Curling my fingers in my glove, I slowly reach out and take his hand. “Thanks, Crew.”
He cracks asmile. “Let’s do this.”
We crouch down, come up, and lean forward at the same time. As we take off, we’re forced to part ways, but Crew sticks close by. The wind hits my face and I roar back at it, hooting and hollering as a smile grows on my face. One of the things I’ve always loved about this sport is the feeling of your soul leaving your body. It’s like it’s trailing behind you and fighting to keep up, but you’re faster. For a short period, you’re free…free from it all.
I’m riding into the orange glow of the sunset as I put my weight on the left side to go around a tree. Shifting right, I dodge a large rock. It’s a bumpy terrain, and the snow is unpacked, but that makes it all the more thrilling.
“I’ve gotta go,” Crew shouts. “You can do this.”
The next thing I know, he’s shifting to the left and taking a different path while I keep straight.
I’m alone in my thoughts, and while on a typical day, that’s scary, right now, it’s exactly what I need.
Neo hates me, that much I know for sure. After recollecting that day, I can’t say I blame him. Doesn’t mean I’ll cower, it just means I need to make things right.
Crew still loves me, I also know that for sure. He wanted to hate me and blame me because it’s what Neo wanted, but I can see it. I can feel it. His feelings haven’t changed.
Jagger is trying. He’s stuck in the muddled mess of what’s right and wrong. Then again, I think we all are.
When I reach the end of this mountain, I have to make a choice. I can keep on pretending nothing ever happened. I can go back to my dorm, live with Riley, and try to survive all this on my own.
Or, I can move into that house, show Neo how far I can bend before I break, and prove to him I’m not the monster he wants me to be. In doing so, I’ll also earn their help in finding out who’s trying to hurt me.
The sun has dipped farther and there’s only a sliver of light left as I near the bottom. Bent over, I take a sharp turn to the right and go around a large evergreen. As I come out in front of it, I see someone.
It’s not Crew, but someone else. Just standing there in a trench coat with a hood pulled over his head. No board, no skis. Shivers skate down my spine, and as I pass him, I look over my shoulder, noticing he’s turned to keep watching me go down.
My balance gets shaky and I lean back, trying to steady myself. When I lean too far, I come forward.
Shit.
I see the fall coming before it happens, so I flex my legs, tuck my arms inward, and fall back.
I’m on my ass when I look behind and see that the person is gone. This wasn’t a case of a stranger being on the mountain. No. Whoever that is knew I’d be here. And the only person I can think of is Neo.
I get myself back up, and it’s slow moving at first, but a minute later, I’m flying again.
By the time I reach the bottom, the sun has completely set, but it doesn’t matter. Standing at the bottom of the hill is a large crowd, probably half the student body. There’s a large fire, people around it, drinking and having a good time.
Before I come to a complete stop, Neo steps in front of me, and I lift my feet, spraying him with snow from under my board.
“Knew that was coming,” he says, brushing off his chest and wiping his face.
“You deserve it.” I drop my board and pick it up, stuffing it under my arm. “Are you happy now?”
“I have to say, I didn’t think you’d do it.”
“Your first mistake would be doubting me. Your second would be thinking you know me at all.” I step past him and lift my goggles to my forehead.
I spot Jagger by the fire and he raises his cup, smiling at me.
Riley comes running at me and throws herself into my arms. “I can’t believe you went down that big-ass hill.” She has no idea of some of the mountains I’ve conquered in my lifetime. I’d invite her to go along for a ride, but I’m not sure I’ll ever bring an amateur back on the slopes.
