AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Hurt paints his face, but he doesn’t push further. “You’re right.”
My mouth is ready for a fight before I hear his response. “I’m serio—” I cut myself off when the words finally register in my head. “What?”
“You’re right, Monkshood.” He steps forward again, and this time I don’t stop him. “You deserve everything you want and more. It would be selfish of me to ask you to wait on me to figure out how to be all you need.” He brushes his hand along the side of my face before leaning down and kissing my hair. “One day a man will come into your life and he will be all you dreamed of. He’ll sweep you off your feet and head straight to the beach for that house you’ve always wanted. He’ll be everything I can’t.”
He pushes past me and opens his door. The magnitude of his words finally hit me, and I realize he heard every word I said that day. That’s why there was no fight, only his explanations. Suddenly, everything becomes too real. I felt decent when I was the one ending things, but now with him doing it, things are different. It is almost as if it’s a whole new hurt.
My mind won’t formulate any words to try and fight what he said, and there is no point. There is no going back at this point. Bridges have been burned, trust has been abolished and hearts have been broken. What’s done is done, and maybe it’s for the best. After all, Teddy and I were never meant to be together.
Happily ever afters don’t exist in our world. In this world.
Still, as I search the stillness on his face for just a glimpse of emotion, I feel a certain need to argue or back track, something, but my mind won’t let me. So instead, I walk past him. The hallway seems colder than before. I want to turn around, tell him I change my mind, but his door closes before I can, and it’s probably for the best. I need to remember who he is. What he did. I need to do as he asked. Hate him.
The house seems soundless, and it puts me on edge. Or perhaps, it’s always this quiet, but I’ve just never noticed because I’ve always had a distraction. I walk back to my room and sit on my bed for the first time since that night, and I don’t cry or cringe. Is it possible Teddy knew exactly what he was doing? Giving me the closure I needed even though I don’t feel I got closure at all.
I knead my hands over my mattress and grip the comforter. It isn’t the same one I’ve had. It’s softer and lighter, and it makes me think of Lucas. I asked him to get rid of everything, and he did, at least as much as he could.
I stand and walk to where my bag is on the floor and pick it up. I fish out my phone and see there are still no missed calls, voicemails, or texts. Granted, I was veryupset after finding Lucas and Julius practically killing Teddy, but I can’t think of anything I said that would warrant him leaving. Not like this—with no word. I replay the words over and over in my head, making sure I didn’t overlook anything.
I thumb through my contacts. This time I stop in the J’s. I have tried to reach Lucas to no avail, so instead of calling him again and risking the same feeling of defeat, I text Julius.
CHARLIE: You still up?
Three dots dance at the bottom of the screen before a thumbs-up emoji comes in.
I roll my eyes and laugh.
CHARLIE: Meet me in the kitchen?
Again, the three dots pop up but only for a split second before I get a response.
JULIUS: K.
I leave my room and go to the kitchen. When I walk in, Julius is already sitting on a barstool with a drink in front of him. “Hey, Jules.”
He turns and tips his chin. “Everything okay?”
Hearing him talk is still almost weird, but it’s becoming more and more normal. At least for us.
“I talked to Teddy.” I try not to let the words affect me, but they do. I feel sad, a little angry still, and somehow… relieved? I maintain composure, yet tears still bite at the back of my eyes.
He scoots the stool next to him out and gently pats the seat, motioning for me to join him. “We don’t have to talk about it. Sometimes silence is the best medicine.”
I nod and take a seat next to him, thankful he understands, or at least pretends to. I hate having to repeat myself and have everything play through my head over and over. I didn’t come in here to talk, not really anyway; I just didn’t want to be alone.
He brings his glass between us, offering me a drink, but the smell alone of the alcohol makes me want to vomit. He tips his head with a grin. “Have you eaten anything today?”
The past few weeks, my days and nights have run together, so I can’t even answer that honestly. “I don’t remember,” I chuckle.
Without another word, he stands and walks to the other side of the bar. He pulls bread from the cabinet and starts untwisting its tie. “PB&J or grilled cheese?”
I laugh again. “Is that all you know how to make?”
He throws his hand to his chest. “I’m offended you would think such a thing. For your information, I know my way around a kitchen, but only the girls I fuck get to see that. Give them an orgasm or two, feed ’em, then send them on their way.”
“You’re the exact definition of a player, you know that?”
He winks at me. “You didn’t answer my question, Flower.”
I roll my eyes and point to the stove. “Grilled cheese.”
“Coming right up.”
The rest of the night, we sit in a comfortable silence while I eat and Julius drinks. Normally the quiet gets awkward, but with him it feels right. It feels safe. And in a way, it makes me feel I’m with Lucas too.
