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32
Xeno
“Where is she?” I snap, entering the living room a couple hours after storming out of it. Dax sits alone nursing a glass of whisky, the tumbler dangling between his middle finger and thumb as he stares at the amber liquid lost in thought. “Dax?”
“My room, asleep.”
“Zayn and York?”
“Out cold.”
Spinning on my feet I head back the way I came. I’m a rude cunt, I know that, but I don’t give a shit. I just need my girl. I need her so bad I can’t fucking think straight. Dax follows me.
“Xeno, what are you doing?” he asks, clamping his hand on my shoulder and forcing me to stop. He moves in front of me, blocking my way along the hallway.
“What the fuck do you thinkyou’redoing?”
“You’re not in the right frame of mind to see Kid just yet,” he replies. “You need to get your head straight.”
“Don’t tell me what I need, Dax. You don’t get to decide when I see my girl.”
Dax grits his jaw and uses his considerable size to block my way. “Ourgirl, you fucker, and I won’t let you near her when you’re like this. You need to calm down, right the fuck now.”
“Iamcalm.”
“You’re not calm. You know it. I know it. You’re angry. I fucking get it. Weallare, but you going in there like this isn’t gonna solve a damn thing.”
“We could’ve lost her!”
“I know that. We didn’t.”
“And we won’t when I fucking kill that cunt David.”
“Jesus, where’s your head at, man? This ain’t like you.” Dax squeezes my arm gently, concern written across his face. “You know it’s a suicide mission.”
“I need him dead.”
“Do you fucking hear yourself? You're the one who makes sure we don’t lose our shit and go off the rails. You make sure we never do something stupid. You’re the one who holds us together. You’re the glue, man. Please don’t come unstuck now. We need you to keep your head.”
“Fuck!” My shoulders drop as I feel the weight of our situation sit heavily upon them. Dax is right, but I can’t seem to control this fear inside my chest. We came so fucking close to losing Tiny and it almost brought me to my knees. Seeing that prick bleeding out was the only thing to stop me from losing my mind entirely. If Zayn hadn’t taken out Jeb, I would’ve. Now all I can focus on is killing David. It’s the only thing preventing me from losing my ever-loving mind. Ihaveto take him out. Ihaveto keep the people I love safe.
“Think about this logically, without all the emotion. David lives in a fortress over there. You’ve seen the intel on his place. He barely leaves the compound, and when he does, he’s surrounded by at least a dozen armed guards. Jeb had no idea about how powerful David had become, but we do.Youdo. It’s an impossible task.”
I run a hand through my hair, grasping at the ends and tugging before meeting Dax’s infuriated stare with one of my own. “Theonlything getting me through is knowing that in a few day’s time I’ll be blowing David’s brains out.”
“Deep down you know that ain’t how it’s gonna play out, right?”
“Iknowhe has to die.”
“He does, I don’t dispute that. You’re good at what you do, Xeno, but you won’t get close enough. It’s a fool’s errand and you fucking know it.”
“I don’t want to talk about it anymore. My mind’s made up. I want to see Tiny…” I counter, stepping around Dax who just moves in front of me again. “Get the fuck out of my way!”
“No, Xeno.”
“What the fuck do you think I’m going to do, huh? Iloveher, Dax!” I shout, and this time my voice fucking cracks like a goddamn pussy. “Ineedher.”
Dax eyes flicker with sympathy. “I know you do, Xeno, but I also know you need to get your head right. Please, man. Do this for me, for Kid. Get some proper rest then come find her when you’re feeling calmer. She’s barely slept these past few days. I’ll watch over her in the meantime.”
