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I give a non-committal nod and say uncertainly, “Yeah.”
“You don’t sound very sure. If you don’t tell me, I can’t fucking help you,” he growls and stalks off.
He’s right. I know he is. I’m afraid that if I look at those tests I’ll see the row of tombstones again, and I’d rather dream of being stabbed in the throat by my father than think about my men dying.
Around seven in the evening, I hear the gates out front opening and cars driving into the underground garage. A moment later, Salvatore, Cassius, and Vinicius walk through the door.
“What’s going on?” I ask them.
Cassius presses a kiss to my mouth. “We’re having dinner together. I hope you’re hungry because Lorenzo suggested ordering Chinese.”
I give him a tight smile, realizing I’ve lost my appetite. Lorenzo is watching me silently from the other side of the room. It’s not unusual for us all to eat together, but I have the feeling that he invited the others over so that one of them could discover what’s eating me.
No one seems in a hurry to order food just yet. Lorenzo throws a bag of peanuts on the table and the men chat about their day. I sit silently in an armchair, the same thoughts revolving through my mind.
If I am pregnant…
It was a nightmare, not a vision…
Just get it over with…
I mutter something about using the bathroom and go upstairs. I close my eyes, open the drawer, and stuff all the tests in my jeans without looking at them. I also grab the instructions out of the trash and slip them into my back pocket.
Downstairs, the four of them stop talking as I stand in the middle of the room.
“You okay, baby?” Salvatore asks, his blue-green eyes filled with concern.
I take a deep breath. “Over the past few weeks, I told you all something individually. Now I have something to tell you all together.”
Vinicius smiles at me. “We love you too, kitten. It’s all right. Don’t look so terrified.”
“It’s not that.” I look from one of them to the next. “I’m late.”
Lorenzo’s face splits into a grin. “I fucking knew it. You were creeping around doing secret shit this morning. Why didn’t you tell me you were taking a pregnancy test? I could have helped you.”
“You think you’re pregnant?” Salvatore asks, shooting to his feet. “Let’s do a test now!”
“I already did. I took four tests this morning, one for each of you. But I haven’t looked at the results yet.”
I indicate my jeans pocket, and Vinicius’ eyes widen. “Can we see?”
Haltingly, I dig the tests out and place them on the coffee table. They stare at them, and then at me.
“What do they mean?”
“Is that positive or…?”
“Chiara, are you pregnant?”
“Oh, shit. The instructions.” I tug them out and place them next to the tests.
Salvatore snatches up the paper and peers at it. The others cluster around him, trying to see. He suddenly shouts, “Baby, you’re pregnant.”
I watch their faces closely as they process what I’ve just told them. Salvatore stares like he’s been hit over the head by a mallet. Vinicius raises his eyes to mine and breaks into a smile. Cassius nods slowly and straightens his cuffs, chest puffed out. Lorenzo picks up each of the tests and examines them closely.
“Oh, my God,” Salvatore says in wonder, a smile spreading over his face. “We’re going to be fathers.”
I was hoping that knowing the results would dispel my sense of dread, but it suddenly doubles.
