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Chapter Twenty-Five
Grace
Iwanted to know what Elizabeth knew that her stepmother didn’t.She refused to tell me, said I’d have to find out for myself.She said we all do, eventually.One evening, we’re all sitting around in the common room.The common room is the type of room that could be found in any rundown motel; it is a bland and vague accommodation.It offers nothing but a deep and unsettling calm, a surrender, made to distract the imagination of those who seek respite from the trauma of their own minds, who search out its pacifying effects in hopes all their problems will temporarily vanish.
On the television, President Kennedy is giving a dramatic speech.He is talking about unmistakable evidence—about the Soviets placing missiles off our coast.It sounds important, but I am only half listening.Mostly, I’m thinking about Charles and the maps he was supposed to deliver.The other things I was sure hehaddelivered.
Was this what it was all about?Had Charles realized what he was doing, delivering documents from someone in Russia to a liaison here?Did he realize it was dangerous?That he was in over his head?That what he was doing possibly had far worse consequences than he could have ever imagined?
And if so, who was he working for?The enemy?Did he even know?
Did he sense that we were all about to be blown to smithereens?Is that why he ran?
I don’t know.I only know that it’s unlikely I’ll find the answers sitting in here.I have no clue where my children or my husband are.I only know there are people who might.And those people aren’t exactly paying me any visits.I turn to Elizabeth and tug at her sleeve.“How are you going to get out of here?What’s your escape plan?”
“What’s it to you?”
“If you don’t tell me, I am going to die.”
She looks at me and rolls her eyes.“God, you’re so dramatic.”
“Please, Elizabeth.I have to know.”
A smile lights up her face.“I dig it.Really, I do.Such desperation.”
“Have you escaped before?”
She raises her brow, like she is about to let me in on a big secret.“Dr.B promised me champagne on my birthday.It’s coming up, you know.”
I don’t see what this has to do with anything.
“I might even get outdoor privileges,” she tells me with that coy look of hers.
“Is that your plan?”I hadn’t been outdoors, not since they brought me here, so I have no idea how difficult it might be to escape.
“Maybe.”
“Seems like you have a lot to look forward to.”
“Not as much as you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I heard you socked Dr.B.”
I scoff.“Of course you did.”I’m both intrigued and irritated that they discuss me.And perhaps there’s a sense of betrayal, as well.Mostly, there’s the feeling that I don’t know who to trust, and that it’s meant to be that way.“But did you hear why?”
President Kennedy ends his speech.We both stare at the television.
Martha runs around the room screaming, “We’re all going to die!”
Elizabeth turns to me and leans in.“Didn’t need to ask.I can put two and two together.”
Martha continues her shouting.“Every day is worse than the one before, so every day you see me is the worst day of my life.”
Elizabeth looks at her and smiles.Then she looks back at me.“I don’t want to scare you, Grace.But this is a very dangerous time for you.”
Her warning isn’t helpful.I am scared.“I know.”
