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“Marian, for god’s sake,” neighbor Dave, the owner of Babylon’s only organic food store, said. “Look at the grandmothers’ boyfriends! Would you want those two toothless crowbaits having free access to your house?”
“I suppose not.”
“If you need to go and don’t want to use the outhouses, go home. You live fifty feet from here.”
Down at the water’s edge, eight little kids played with nannies in the water, a lifeguard with a body out ofMuscle and Fitnesskeeping the children safe while their mothers—Lisa, Alison and Julie in a huddle—drank wine.
“Why’s Dan here alone?” Alison asked, noticing that he’d just arrived. “He told Adam that he was picking up Lily at one.”
“I shouldn’t even repeat this, but I’m going to,” Lisa said, relating the story she’d heard from Dan.
“Wait. Adam went to Dan’s house and told him and then came home for lunch and didn’t tell me? That was some nerve.”
“He probably didn’t want to upset you,” Julie said.
“If Lily isn’t here now, it must mean they had a fight,” Lisa said. “Should I snoop?”
“Yes,” Alison said, pushing her. “I’m pissed! I’m ready to tell Adam to fire that bitch.”
“I agree,” Julie said, watching Lisa march off to ambush Dan.
“The only problem, if he fires her, what if she blabs? What’s the penalty for incest in New York State?”
“Alison, you didn’t know he was your brother, did you?”
She did, but since it appeared no one had remembered, she decided to go with it.
“Ignorance is bliss,” Alison said, looking at the children. “Look at my kids. I have poor homely Diana, who looks just like her father; gorgeous Morgan, who looks like a Smith; and biracial Melody, who is black with blue eyes. The contrast is amazing.”
“I think Diana will grow into her looks, like those horse-faced models who look like living skeletons but they make millions a year capitalizing on it.”
“I hope you’re right because right now she’s a mess.”
“Poor Diana,” Julie said, who was rarely sentimental. “Don’t talk about your own kid like that, Alison.”
“I only am honest with you and Lisa. You should hear Adam praising her. If anything, her ego will be huge.”
“Oh god, here comes Lisa with Dan trailing.”
“Wave,” Julie hissed.
“You’re my favorite women,” he said, stretching his arms around them.
“Don’t let Pam hear you say that,” Lisa said. “You still have her conned.”
“Aw, I love Pam. This is my posse,” he said. “You’re definitely my posse. Now I find out my latest girlfriend is hateful just when it was going to take some of the heat off you guys.”
“Dan, no one is complaining about you. Stop trying to get involved just for the sake of getting involved,” Lisa snapped. “At Christmas, we were trying to decide if we should gang up on Lily, but Julie reminded us that she was Adam’s baker. If we mess with his baker, what will he do?”
“Bakers are a dime a dozen around here,” Alison said. “What I’m really interested right now is what Hocus has to say about her.”
“Look, I’m not sure Hocus knows the whole story,” Dan said. “Less is more. Incest is a class E felony in New York. If someone wanted to make an issue of it, Alison, you and Ryan could be charged with it and go to jail for up to four years.”
“No one will talk to Hocus, then,” Alison said.
“Hey, they could charge me, too,” Lisa cried. “Don’t talk about this to anyone, okay?”
“Mum’s the word,” they all said, putting their baby fingers together.
