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Shattered.
Bruised.
Fucked.
I blinked hard to focus my eyes on the ceiling, spooked by the many down lights peering over me like beady eyes. My hearing pricked to a mechanical, almost static sound with the sounds of beeps running through every two seconds. I turned and smiled at seeing Kane’s handsome face grinning back at me.
“I want to swear right now, but I need to rein that in. But shit Lacey, you had me worried,” he said, and I didn’t get time to respond when he plunged his mouth into mine.
“Shit is a swear word.” I laughed. I raised my hand to my sore throat, trying to soothe the soreness away. The dryness inside was like I’d eaten sand for my last meal.
I gasped as my hand slowly swiped my swollen stomach, and knew there was nothing inside me.
There was no baby inside me.
Fear gripped me and I quickly pushed my hands on the bed, desperate to ready myself to sit up. “My baby,” I whispered. “Where is she?”
“Lie down, she’s asleep in the crib.” He pointed to a tiny bed behind him.
“Can I see her?” I asked as tears quickly sprang to my eyes. “I need to hold her.”
Kane gave me a gentle nod, standing and he walked around the bed to my other side, propping two pillows at the top of the bed before he slid one hand underneath my back and the other under my legs. He manoeuvred my body into a semi-sitting position.
“Stay there,” he said.
I looked around at the wires attached to me and the machine. “Can we remove these?”
He shook his head. “We better speak to the doctor. You were in a bad way at one point,” he said, and my eyes popped open. He nodded as his lips grimaced into a tight line.
“Oh.”
“Mmm... You stay there, don’t move. I’ll bring our daughter to you.”
He walked away to the crib he had pointed out, and I tried to crane my neck to see her. I was desperate to see her, to kiss her and to cuddle her.
My baby.
“Seb left about fifteen minutes ago to have a shower. I sent him home because I think he was having a nervous breakdown.”
“Why?” I asked.
“He was desperate for you to wake up. I think he thought you weren’t going to.”
“Poor Seb,” I whispered. My Seb, my flirty but loving man. “Call him, let him know.”
“I will soon,” he said.
“Have I been asleep long?” I asked.
“Longer than the doctor said you would, but those wires let me know you were fine.” he pointed to the heart monitor behind him. “Not that they convinced Seb you would wake up.”
“And Ryan? Is he okay? Was he in pain?”
“He didn’t come here, remember,” he said, laying a bundle in my arms. Swathed in a white blanket and all I could see was a little nose, cupid bow lips and chubby pink cheeks.
“She’s perfect,” I said. Tears sprang to my eyes. I dipped my head low to kiss her face.
“Of course she is. I’m her dad.”
