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You gave Temra a real home and got her out of that orphanage. You raised her to be the amazing person that she is and worked so she could focus on her schooling.
And though my anxiety doesn’t go away, I feel a little better as I start my day.
As we travel, and I start to fixate on the fact that I miss the wayKellyn and I used to be together, the fact that he’s moved on, that I let him go—I force my brain to think the following:
The time we had together was precious to me, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Sometimes relationships don’t work out, and it’s very unrealistic to think that my first one would be the one that sticks.
My eyes drift over to Kellyn, the way he concentrates on the road in front of him, deep in thought. Then my eyes lower to his lips. And I forget what I’d been thinking about altogether.
I feel foolish, after a time, forcing myself to think more positively, but I make a promise to myself to do it again tomorrow.
After another week of riding, we stumble upon a road in the woods. It’s clearly not well traveled, with plants finding purchase in the spaces between where the wheels have worn down the ground. I find another tree to climb and take a look ahead.
I’m surprised by what I find: rooftops and chimneys in the breaks between trees.
“There’s a village up ahead,” I tell Kellyn when my feet touch the ground again.
“I didn’t know there was anything out here. I’ve never traveled so far from the main road in this territory, and I’ve never seen anything on a map this way. Should we skirt around it?”
“It’ll add time to the trip. It’s a pretty big village.” The leftover money from selling Ravis’s dagger is attached to my saddlebags. I don’t like the idea of interacting with anyone, but if Kellyn is willing to do the talking… “Maybe we could get lodging for tonight? Sleep in real beds?”
“That sounds nice.”
I keep my horse close to Kellyn’s as we enter town. The temperature has cooled somewhat as we’ve traveled south, and thepeople here wear more layers than those back in the capital. No one stares at us, which leads me to believe they’re used to visitors. Whatever this place is, it’s much bigger than Amanor.
There’s even an inn.
We keep our weapons and money with us after leaving the horses with a stable girl. Once inside the inn, I feel my nerves ratcheting up. As I look around, I try to turn the people into blurs. I don’t want to register faces or anything else. It’ll just make me more unsettled.
I follow Kellyn up to the bar, where he exchanges greetings with the owner.
“This here is Vinder. We’re a community of hunters and farmers. We work with many merchants who sell pelts to the nearby territories. Some folks like to camp out this way before heading to find food for their families. We’re so far from the capital that the prince can’t catch us for poaching.” The owner winks.
Kellyn pays the man for food and baths and a room with two beds.
At the mention oftwo beds, the owner looks between the two of us.
“My sister,” Kellyn says.
The man nods in understanding before putting in our order to the kitchen.
Kellyn turns to me. “Would you mind terribly if we ate in here?”
“With all the people?” I ask.
“I just… want to do something normal for a change. Feel normal.”
I’m reminded of just how different we are that being around people is normal for him. But I don’t blame him. Being around people who don’t want to hurt him must be a nice change. Hedoesn’t wear bandages around his head anymore, and his hair covers his injury. But it’s still there, and as I remember that I got him hurt, I find that I can’t deny him this.
“Sure. Pick a table,” I say.
Kellyn looks to me in surprise, as though he fully expected me to refuse and beg him to take me upstairs.
“Are you certain?” he asks.
“Yes.”
We settle into a couple chairs at a small two-person table. I hide my hands in my lap immediately, and my fingers tangle together, twisting the joints before picking at my cuticles. Kellyn looks so relaxed, but I feel a prickling at my back. Half the room is behind me and can see me without my knowing. I hate that.
