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“You are not. We had the same mom, didn’t we?”
“Yeah,” I sniffle into her body and I love my sister, but I really wish it was Titan’s arms around me right now. Titan reassuring me that he doesn’t hate me and that he loves… that he will love our baby.
“Jack isn’t ruined…”
“He’s beautiful,” I agree because my nephew is. He’s the best and he never fails to make me smile.
“And your child will be all that and more to you, Faith,” she whispers, kissing the top of my head.
“He walked away without a word, Hope,” I tell her again, because Titan’s reaction cut me deeply. I was afraid he’d be mad and want to kill me. Now, I realize, I’d rather that had been his reaction. At least, I would have known how he felt…
“It will be okay, sweetheart. I promise. It will work out. You weren’t here, you didn’t see how destroyed I was when Aden left me, but it worked out. We found our way back to one another. And…”
“You two loved each other. Titan and I are just… fuck buddies,” I tell her, and I hate those words. I hate them. Besides, they’re not even true. We were a drunken mistake. A mistake that made a child…
“It will be okay. If Titan doesn’t man up, you don’t need him. You have your family and what’s more important, this child has your family and he or she will have you as a mom.”
“That’s what I’m—”
“And you will be an awesome mother, Faith. You may not believe that, but I definitely do.”
I let her words wash over me and I pray she’s right.
I’m scared she’s wrong.
thirty-one
titan
“Faith.”
I call to her standing in the middle of LAX. She’s with Black, and I hate that I’ve waited this long to talk to her. I didn’t really expect her to leave so quickly. I thought she would stay here and visit with Hope. They’ve moved here permanently while Aden works on the new film he’s directing. When I showed up this morning Hope chewed my ass out. It was deserved, I know, so I took it without comment. I had to have a few days to wrap my head around everything. I never planned on becoming a father. I really never planned on it with a woman I’m not in a relationship with. I don’t even know how to classify Faith. She’s not a girlfriend, she’s not even a friend at this point. If anything, she’s been a pain in my ass.
And really damn good in bed.
None of that screams relationship. None of that screams mother of my children. So I took a few days to get my head together. I should have known she wouldn’t wait around—she never does.
“Titan,” she says, her face closed off and the light in her eyes so dull that she looks like a different person.
“We need to talk.”
She frowns. Her gaze moves over my body, her face giving nothing away. She looks up at Black and some kind of silent communication moves between them. He nods, then cuts me a look like he’d like to have his own talk with me. I have no doubt he will at some point.
“Titan, they will be boarding the plane soon,” she says, her voice somber and without any of the sass that’s normally attached.
“Stay here.”
“I need to get back. I start a new job next week and I need to find a place to live. Living with my aunt isn’t going to cut it with a baby on the way,” she says, her pale face coloring with her words like she’s embarrassed.
I reach behind the base of my spine and rub the tension that’s there, feeling like I’m walking on eggshells. I feel like one wrong step and she’s going to completely pull away from me.
“You could stay here—with me, I mean,” I respond. I see surprise on her face for the briefest of seconds, before she taps it down.
“I don’t think that would be a wise thing to do.”
“Why not? It will give us both time to come to terms with what’s happening.”
“Come to terms? It’s not a death sentence, Titan. No one has been diagnosed with cancer or some other kind of disease. It’s a baby. My baby.”
“Our baby, Faith.”
“Only if you want it to be,” she murmurs, rubbing her stomach gently.
“What are you saying?”
“I’m just… Look, if you want to be part of this child’s life, that’s awesome. We can work together and make that happen. But, if you don’t, that’s fine too. This doesn’t have to change anything for you.”
“You’re pregnant with my child, Faith. That changes everything.”
“It doesn’t have to.”
“It does. Is that what you think of me, Faith? That I’m not man enough to stand up to my mistakes?” I growl and I can’t keep the anger from bleeding through. People are starting to gather around us, listening—but, fuck… She wanted to talk here and if that’s the only play I have, I’ll take it.
