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“What’s going on, Dee?” he asks slowly and full of concern. “Is it about Eli?”
Swallowing, I continue, “No, it’s not about him. That’s for another time. I can’t talk about him right now. It’s… it’s about my daughter.”
Harley slams on the brakes.
My body jerks forward.
“What?” He maneuvers the car to the side of the road, puts it in park, then swings his body in my direction.
“I have a daughter.”
Slowly, a smile grows on Harley’s face. “I’m an uncle?”
“Yeah,” I say slowly.
Harley releases a breath. “How old is she?”
“She’ll be one in a month.”
Harley takes off his cap and runs his hands through his hair and then down his face. “Wow, that’s amazing, Dee. What’s her name?”
“Olive.” My throat swells as I say the word, knowing the meaning it has to our entire family. Mom was the glue for our family—she held everything and everyone together. I can’t help but think what my life would’ve turned out like if she’d been here to guide and help me in a way that my dad couldn’t.
“After Mom?” he asks. I don’t miss the glistening tears in his eyes before he quickly wipes them away.
“Yes. No other name was as perfect. She’s beautiful, Harley. I never wanted to keep her from the family. Other issues got in my way. Ones I don’t w-want to dwell on.” My voice cracks, emotion thick in the truck’s cabin, it rolls around us in waves.
Harley leans over and pulls me into an awkward hug. “I can’t wait to meet her.”
“Good, because she’ll be here about lunchtime today. I left her with Isla. She was telling me Olive had a bad night and isn’t settling well.” He releases me, and we settle back into our seats. I wish I could read his mind and know if he’s genuinely happy for me or putting it on. On the outside, it appears he’s happy.
“Okay, we’ll make sure we’re home by then. That’s if you can stop yourself from buying too many horses,” he mocks, knowing me so well. We once walked away with six horses, and they are still at the ranch being used for therapies and vacation guests.
I laugh, and it’s as though a bit of the weight I’ve been carrying on my shoulders has lifted a little. Now to wait and see how the rest of the family takes the news of Olive. Especially Dad and Tally. “I’ll do my best not to go too crazy.”
“You’re a mom. That’s crazy, Dee. I’m sad that you kept it from us. We all would’ve loved to meet her.”
“I know. Things weren’t great at the time of her birth. There’s so much more to it, and when I’m ready, I’ll tell the family, but I think it’s more of a pride thing right now. I don’t know if I’m ready to admit that Dad was right about some things.” He puts the car in drive, and we head off again, passing other homesteads that are still dark.
“You do realize Dad isn’t going to hold anything in the past against you,” he says cautiously.
I cock an eyebrow, turning to him as he focuses on the road. “You sure about that? Because it feels like he’s doing that right now.”
Harley releases a breath. “Dee, you left. We didn’t hear from you for three years. We don’t know anything about your life during those years. Let’s drop the bomb of a baby in there now. It’s a lot to take in. Some find it hard to forgive the silence, and that’s the main problem. You could’ve kept in touch.”
“I kept in contact with Sybil,” I state. “I don’t understand why it was all up to me to try to fix things or communicate. I was made to feel like the leper of the family… the black sheep. I had you and Hudson on Dad’s side, and he basically slandered me because of my relationship with Eli. The girls were too afraid to offer their thoughts for fear of the same treatment. Now Tally is mad at me for the reasons you stated, but what was I supposed to do? Not even Sybil knows the full story of what happened when I left. Only Isla does because I wasn’t afraid of her judging me.” I stop before I drop everything onto his lap.
“Dee, when are you going to stop thinking we all hate you? It kinda shocked us that you’ve shown up out of the blue. We don’t know what to think. Yes, Tally is a little more upfront about her feelings, but she’s been stewing on these for the past three years. You closed yourself off to all of us.”
“No, you all could’ve contacted me if you wanted,” I snap a little more harshly than I intended.
“I guess we all could’ve done better, yourself included,” he says gently. I immediately regret my outburst.
“Do you think they’ll accept Olive? The rest of the family, I mean?”
“Why wouldn’t they?”
“Because she’s Eli’s child, and I know he’s no one’s favorite person.” I glance out the window and watch the trees and paddocks glide past us. We’re close to our destination, and it can’t come soon enough. This conversation has been hard, and even mentioning Eli’s name out loud pains me in ways I can’t fully describe.
