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“Better, if that’s possible. I’m not carrying extra dead weight with me anymore. When Olive’s old enough, I’ll talk to her about him, but for now, I don’t need to stay stuck in his shadow. He chose to do what he did. That’s okay, and I forgive him for everything. I have Olive, and she’s all that matters to me.”
“You’re such a brave woman with so much fire in your heart. Perhaps your new heart has been strong enough to help you get through all of the things you’ve faced since you received it.”
I shrug. “Maybe.” Gripping the box, I go to one of the bookshelves and reach up and put it up high. Now it’ll be out of sight and mind until the day Olive asks about him. I turn and study Sebastian. He fidgets with his fingers in his lap as his eyes dart around the room.
“Something’s wrong, and it’s not me crying here right now?” I have a feeling what this could be about. He got the call he’s been waiting for—it’s written all over his face, and the sadness in his eyes slams into me. I knew this would possibly come, now it has, and I’m not sure how to feel.
“YOU’RE RIGHT. SOMETHING IS UP,” I say and stand from my spot on the couch. I’d much rather sit there all day with her, comforting, cuddling, and kissing her. Being so close to her is soothing and settling. Thoughts of her consume me.
She takes a seat at the window again, clearly a favorite spot of hers. “You’re leaving. You got the call you’ve been waiting for,” she states with a small smile.
“How?” I ask. She’s caught me off-guard.
“I’m taking a guess here. Am I right?”
I move to sit beside her and take her hand in both of mine. “I don’t want to leave. I wanted to spend more time with you. I wanted Rylee to have some lessons. Even though this is what I’ve been waiting for, it’s come at a time when I’m struggling to want to go. Something is holding me here, and that’s you.” I never thought I’d say that sentence, but Delilah has taken hold of my heart, and I don’t want her to let go.
She places her hand on top of mine, holding hers. “This is who you are. You need to go and win those races. I’m sure it’s what Anna-Beth would want you to do.”
“What about you?” I ask.
She smiles, and her eyes light up shimmery blue because of her freshly fallen tears. “I’ll be okay. This isn’t about me. It’s all about you and the girls.”
“You’re right, but I can’t help wanting to stay with you. You’ve had this hold over me from the moment we met in front of the barn. Everything about you captivates me. You’re amazing, and I don’t want to be away from you. Would you consider coming with me?”
Her eyes widen, and she leans back a little but doesn’t pull away. “I’d love to, but I can’t. I need to be here with Olive for a little while. I need to recharge my batteries and fix a relationship with my father that’s been broken for the last three years.” She pauses a moment. “You go do you, and I’ll be here when and if you still want. Either way, I’ll be okay.”
Delilah’s words seep into my bones. It’s not the answer I want, but it’s the right one. I know it, and obviously, she does as well. I don’t want to accept it, though. I wish she had said yes and was coming with me.
“I don’t want to leave you,” I say softly as I press my forehead to hers.
“It gives me a chance to grow and learn to be on my own. We can always call and message when you’re free, and maybe this could be a test.”
“A test?” I echo.
“Yeah. If these feelings are still there after some time apart, we can try to make something of them, but I think, for now, this might be for the best.” Her eyes shimmer with more tears, and a weak smile spreads across her face.
“If that’s what you’d like, I’m happy to give it a go.”
“Whatever happens, happens for a reason. You go win these races and prove to all of them that you’ve still got it. This is who you are. Don’t change that for anyone, except maybe your girls. They’re the only ones who get a choice.” She squeezes my hands. It’s comforting.
“You’re right. Can you do me one favor, though?”
“Sure. What’s that?”
“Can you take Rylee for a ride with you on the horse, please? She’s been begging me about riding lessons, and maybe hopping on with you will be good enough until we get back here in the future.”
I don’t plan to stay away.
Delilah is here, and this is where I’ll return to.
I’ll come back for her.
She laughs, and it’s music to my ears. “I’d be happy to take her. I’ll let her ride on her own as well, but I’ll hold the reins. That should tide her over until she comes back.”
“She’d love that.” I give Delilah one last chaste kiss. “Do you want some help in here for a bit? Rylee wanted to see Mabel, so the girls are down there with her. I saw Olive there as well. She’s fitting in perfectly.”
“She’s going to be very bored when your girls leave. There are other kids around but none her age. I’m sad Ruby will miss her birthday party the girls have been planning.”
