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Bennett clears his throat and extends his hand to Sebastian, clearly seeing that I’m not going to introduce them anytime soon.
“Hi, I’m Bennett.”
“Sebastian,” he replies coolly, taking Bennett’s hand on a firm shake before shoving both of his hands into the front pocket of his jeans as he rocks back slightly on his heels, eyes trained on my face.
“What are you doing here, Sebastian?” When I finally manage to push the question out it feels raw against my throat.
“I was in the area. Thought I’d stop by and say hey.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal. Just an old friend dropping by.
“You were in the area?” I repeat slowly.
“Was hoping maybe you’d have time to grab a bite to eat, catch up for a little bit.” He ignores my question completely.
I open my mouth to respond but then close it without uttering a single word. Honestly, I don’t know what the hell to say to that. And as unexpected as it is to find him standing in front of me, I also can’t deny how incredible it is to lay eyes on him after such a long time.
He’s just as perfect as I remember, maybe even more so. Sebastian always was the most attractive person I’d ever seen, still is. I feel guilty even thinking it with Bennett standing next to me, but it’s true. I can’t help it.
“I’m gonna run up and grab my bag out of your room. Why don’t you take some time to talk to your friend?” Bennett offers, pulling my attention to him.
“Are you sure?” I ask, a thick knot in my throat.
“Yeah, of course. I still have a few things I need to take care of before our trip. I’ll just call you later, okay?” He gives me a warm smile before pressing his lips to my forehead in a quick kiss.
Case and point why Bennett is so incredible. My ex-boyfriend shows up out of the blue and instead of being an asshole about it, he offers to give me some time to figure out what he wants and why he’s here. God, he really is amazing.
“Okay.” I force a smile when he pulls back.
“It was nice to meet you, Sebastian,” he calls over his shoulder before taking off toward the entrance of my building, disappearing inside just moments later.
When I slowly turn back to Sebastian, his expression has morphed from carefree to something else entirely. He takes a shaky breath in, his nostrils flaring slightly.
“I take it that’s your boyfriend?” The last part comes off more like a hiss than an actual word.
“He is,” I answer shakily; it’s not like it’s worth hiding at this point.
“How long have you two been seeing each other?”
The last thing I want to do is have this conversation directly outside of my dorm building, so I quickly move to change the direction.
“What are you doing here, Sebastian? And don’t give me that crap about being in the area because we both know that’s not true.”
“I just, fuck.” He runs a hair through his messy hair, making it look even more perfect.
God, why does he have to look so good?
“I just needed to see you,” he finally continues. “Can we maybe go somewhere and talk?”
I want to say no. I want to tell him to go away so I can pretend like he didn’t just show up at the moment when I finally decided I was happy, determined to tear down everything I’ve built in his absence, but I simply can’t do it.
Because at the end of the day, I still love him as much as I did yesterday, as much as I did a year ago, and two years ago and beyond that. Just because I have found some semblance of happiness doesn’t for one second erase the way my heart beats against my ribs or the way my fingers itch to reach out and touch his silky hair. Even after all this time a part of me, a very large part still feels like he belongs to me and I to him.
“Okay.” I finally concede. “There’s a coffee shop just on the edge of campus. It’s only about a five-minute walk.”
“Sounds perfect.” He waits for me to start walking before quickly stepping up next to me, slowing his long stride to match mine so that he can keep my pace.
We don’t speak for most of the walk. It’s clear to see Sebastian is just as in his head as I am in mine, both of us trying to sort through what we’re thinking right now before having to sit down and actually speak it aloud.
“I graduated yesterday.” He finally speaks just as we round the corner to the coffee shop where I’ve worked since freshman year.
