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I take a deep breath that shakes on the way out before turning to face her. Her eyes are soft, a forced smile on her lips. Despite her trying to stay positive, I know she’s as worried as I am about what awaits us.
“No.” The truth falls from my lips. “Even if I had a month to prepare, I still don’t think I would be ready.”
She grabs my hand and gives it an encouraging squeeze. “It might not be as bad as you think. Try to stay positive. What if the prince is charming? Handsome?”
I scrunch my nose. “Minotaurs are not handsome, Liz.”
“You know what I mean,” she sighs. “What if he’s not as bad as you’re imagining? Give it a chance.”
My eyes roll toward the ceiling briefly, even though I know she’s right. I’ve never met Prince Nor. I’ve never laid eyes on him, or anyone from the royal family of Ulleh. There’s a chance—a tiny chance—that they won’t live up to the monstrous reputation that precedes them. They could be welcoming and kind, but the bad taste their race has left in my mouth won’t let me believe it until I see it. Until then, they’re the enemy.
“I’ll try,” I say to end the conversation.
I have enough scattered thoughts running through my mind without worrying about what awaits me in Ulleh. First, I have to survive my departure. I have to face my father for the last time and say goodbye to my people, my home, my world. It isn’t going to be easy, and dread turns my stomach.
“Come on.” Lizette ushers me toward the door. “Your trunks are already loaded onto the carriage. Everything is ready to go.”
Everything except me.
My final walk through the halls of the castle is painful, and I swallow down a sob threatening to shake my chest. I take my time etching every detail of the corridors into my memory. I want to paint every tapestry on the backs of my eyelids and brand every room into my mind so I never forget them. Aside from dresses and a trunk full of herbs, potion ingredients, and trinkets that I’m taking with me, all of this will just be a memory.
I don’t know if I’ll ever have the chance to return. I don’t know if I’ll live that long.
My father waits in the foyer with a handful of guards, and they snap to attention when I round the corner. I put on a smile, even though it’s the last thing I feel like doing, and curtsy when I step in front of them, quickly scanning their faces for any sign of Darsan.
He’s not here.
Part of me is thankful because seeing him again after our awkward goodbye in the storage room would only make things more difficult.
“You look beautiful,” my father says, looking over me. “Just like your mother.”
“Thank you.” I hesitate, not sure what to do next. I haven’t seen or spoken to him since our argument in the throne room. He never sought me out to apologize for my abrupt betrothal or to punish me for interrupting his meeting. Now, he acts like everything is fine when we both know it isn’t.
He shuffles his feet and looks toward the double doors leading to the square. “Make our kingdom proud.”
My shoulders sag. I expected our goodbye to be tense, awkward even, but his quick dismissal is disappointing. If my mother were here, she would hug me tightly and wish me a safe trip. Not Father. In his opinion, a king should never be so soft. Softness is weakness, one that men shouldn’t express.
“I’ll do my best.”
I head toward the front doors as the corners of my eyes begin to sting again, and I blink hard. I can’t let anyone see me cry. They’re all expecting greatness from me. I must be their reassurance. I must give them hope for a brighter future.
Two guards slip ahead of me, flanking either side of the entryway, and they pull open the double doors simultaneously. As they swing open, warm sunlight spills into the hallway and applause erupts outside, making the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. A lot of people showed up to see me off.
Hot air swallows me as I step outside, making the lace sleeves of my dress stick to my skin, and I blink until my eyes adjust to the onslaught of light. A set of stairs leads down to an emerald and gold carriage drawn by four white stallions. My trunks are secured to the back of the carriage, and the door sits open, waiting for us. The driver, a man wearing a blue tailcoat jacket with shortly cropped black hair, stands next to it.
My gaze moves past the carriage to the massive crowd of people collected in the square. Half the kingdom must be crammed in here, standing shoulder to shoulder as they scream and applaud. I raise my hand to wave and their chorus grows louder. They’re here for me, but also the promise of what this alliance between Ulleh and Hyatt means. They’re here because they want change. They want peace.
I can’t let them down.
I make my way down the stairs to the carriage, my eyes flitting through the crowd and searching for a splash of red hair that remains elusive. Of course, Darsan wouldn’t show up today. I can’t blame him. If I were in his shoes, I would have avoided the square today as well.
“Your Highness,” the carriage driver says as he offers me his hand to help me inside.
I throw a look over my shoulder to Lizette, who’s been following silently at my heels the whole time, and she nods me on. I don’t know why her encouragement helps calm the nerves clawing their way up my throat like bile, but it does.
Although it probably hasn’t been used in a decade, the inside of the carriage is beautiful, with plush seats and dark wooden accents. Lizette helps neatly tuck my dress into a manageable position before taking a seat across from me, and the carriage driver closes and secures the door.
“Are you ready?” she asks as I glance out the window and look up at the castle a final time.
